Seeking Gaston Lynx Esquivel

EPILOGUE

"I know that it's about Ada...you changed since you two broke up." She cried harder. "Alam ko, anak...nararamdaman ko...kahit palagi kang nakangiti alam ko..."

It hurt to see her this way. And it's all my fault. Pero anong magagawa ko? I don't even know what to do with myself.

I pulled her closer to mine and hugged her. "I'm gonna be okay, Ma." My eyes got misty too and I don't know if my words were true enough.

I don't know what changed in me either. I am still smiling...I am still with my friends...but somehow, I still feel a huge hollow inside me. I felt like I can't complete myself no matter what I do, no matter what I put inside to make myself complete again. Nothing can fill it. And my parents knew all of it.

But still, I did my best to carry on with my everyday life...pinipigil na isipin siya. I surrounded myself with happy and outgoing people, hoping that I could ride in with their happiness too.

Hoping that someday, we'll see eachother again...and I'll always hope she is in a good condition.

I wasn't a religious person. I never prayed for myself, but I prayed hard for her. For her safety and for her life to go on. Dahil hindi ko ata kakayanin kung nabalitaan ko na lang isang araw...I just know that it will be the end of me too.

Her struggle is my struggle and her pain is my pain.

"Anak, handa ka na ba para bukas?" Papa asked me as we had our dinner outside.

I wiped my lips with my napkin and looked at him seriously. "Opo."

Mama looked at me worriedly. "You're gonna be the CEO, anak, are you sure you can still do both of your jobs after it? How about your health?"

I looked at Mom and smiled warmly. "Of course, Ma. No need to worry."

Mom doesn't need to worry. I would be reserving my weekends for my sessions and counselling , and for weekdays, for the company. I can manage it.

The day I became a Doctor was one of my greatest achievements in life. Not because of the title. Not because I worked hard for it, had sleepless nights for it...but because I felt like I could help her now.

For once...I didn't feel useless.

Pakiramdam ko kapag may natutulungan akong ibang tao...natutulungan ko rin siya. I felt alive. It is fulfilling.

I looked at Papa again seriously. Ummm...she is working there right? So it only means that I would be her Boss? Well, I am very strict. But maybe…she could be my....friend...and I'll be good?

I almost held into my temple tightly with my advanced thinking. I haven't seen her in years and here I am...fuck...I need to calm myself.

That is why the next morning. I prepared so freaking hard. I woke up so early just to have my exercise, I needed to look ripped and so I took my weights. I also jogged and did my reps. Lahat ng iyon ginawa ko.

And when I took a shower. From head to toe, I made sure that I am clean. I made my clothes iron to its finest, with no single wrinkle on sight. I made sure I wore my new shoes and watch. I made sure that my outfit that day was the best of the best. And I almost take a bath with my perfume.

Only for her to take a vacation.

She is on a freaking vacation! For a week! Just how is that?! I could feel anger rising up and my patience thinning up as I sat on my chair, as the newly appointed CEO.

And for what? Maghihintay pa ako ng isang linggo? Fuck!

"S-Sir---"

I piercingly looked at Jess in front. "What?!" Well, I am angry.