And There Were Wolves

forty two | I've got a hundred thrown-out speeches I almost said to you

"So you're telling me that you did not try to get me here so that you and Alana can fool your parents into giving you the company?" I summed up what he was trying to say just to be sure. "Then ditch me later once you get your hands on your inheritance and are free to marry Alana."

"Yes," he said with a sigh. He looked like he wanted to say something more, but instead, he continued to stare at me, waiting for me.

"You seriously want me to believe that you truly want me here to get to know me better?" I made no effort to hide my surprise in my voice. This was no time to play pretend.

"Yes." His voice was dead serious with absolute certainty, and I wanted to believe him. I really did.

But I couldn't and I didn't want to hurt him by telling him that, instead I stood. "You know what, let's talk again tomorrow," I said, then I began walking out of the kitchen, into the living room, and toward the stairs. But he called out my name right when I stepped on the first step of the stairs and I stopped.

I turned around and looked directly at him. There was a chemical reaction of the purest, simplest elements merging together, creating something that felt combustible. Ready to explode at any given time. This moment was the one real moment between the two of us.

Ryker began taking a step toward me, one long stride at a time. Watching, he inhaled deeply, eyes closing, a shudder quivering his muscles. Another step toward me. His hands shook like my heart. Core muscles tightened. My tendons were taut, my bones quaking with the assault inside my body. I watched his muscles contracting, causing spasms under his exposed skin. Another step toward me and I could faintly hear his erratic heartbeat inside his chest. Despite everything else, our bodies synced with each other as if they'd known each other for a long time, longer than how long I'd known him. Longer than a mere month.

Bliss so pure was running up my spine, wrapping around my shoulders and hugging me in its embrace. I let my eyes caress every curve, every edge of his body. I tried to ingrain every detail of skin, the curve of his lips, broad shoulders, muscular neck, and from the way his eyes darkened, I could tell that I was giving off just how much I appreciated what was standing in front of me, how much I liked him physically. His eyes were like burning charcoal at this point, the desire pouring off him in waves. He sucked a breath in and I realized that this was exactly what it had been a month ago in that club. Even though I'd been hazed by my alcohol, I could remember every little detail distinctively.

At last, he was standing right in front of me. His head angled down, and my head automatically tilted up. Our eyes were not leaving each other. His violent shivers shook both of us. There was just a breath that separated our bodies. Dipping his head down toward my neck, he inhaled. Growls vibrated his expanding chest as they pigsty into mine.

I could feel my heart flutter wildly as his nose was almost touching my flesh. His lips were oh so close to my skin, and his fingertips almost touched me. Hovering and waiting. Right when I thought he would pull me towards him, Ryker pulled himself away. It was just a step back, but it felt like we were now standing miles apart. He opened his mouth, letting a long breath out, as he looked me in the eye. Judging by the way he was squaring his shoulders, I knew whatever he was going to say would either make me or break me. I was hoping it would be the first one, but with him, this infamous wild Alpha, I knew there was no guarantee. There was no certainty when it came to this man.

"Wait, I need to explain things to you so there won't be a misunderstanding between us." His agony hurt my ears with the pain he was feeling. It was almost as if I, too, was hurting inside alongside him. "As for Alana—"

" — look, you don't have to explain anything to me," I tried to stop him. Not sure whether hearing this would do me good or harm.

"No, I need to. If I want this — whatever we have — to work, I have to at least try to explain this to you." He inhaled a deep breath, then continued, "I'd been in love with her since I was twelve, or at least I thought I had. We grew up together. As you may have noticed, I'm the youngest child and the age gap between me and my siblings is too apart so yeah, I felt that Alana knew me better than anyone else. I thought that she was what I needed, but when her birthday came and she turned out to be my brother's mate, I walked away. Then he died, and it crushed me. It literally did. He was the only person who wouldn't judge me no matter what I did." He took a sharp breath and his eyes closed for just a fraction of a moment before they opened into the color of ashes. I wanted to reach for him, my fingertips extending, but he was standing just a feather's breadth too far. There were just too many things separating us, too many secrets.

"Alana was the only one who knew my pain. She was his mate. She was there for me and we became close. At first, I didn't want to have a romantic relationship with her, but she confessed that she loved me and she brought up what the sorceress had once told us. She also pointed out the fact that I had the right to be happy just like everyone else," he whispered, and my heart broke. I could imagine how crushed he must've been to lose the one person that understood him the most and whether I admitted it or not, I was happy that he'd had Alana there for him.

"But even then, she wasn't you. She may understand me, but with her, I still felt incomplete. Like there was this hole in my chest that she couldn't fill."

"I don't want to hurt Alana. She was my best friend. She has always been there. She's all I have ever known. Ever had." His fists clenched, his canines descended, and his jaw started to take on an irregular shape as his muscles started shifting into his wolf's form. He gave a loud grunt, shaking his head back and forth, pain etched across his face. He was trying to prevent a shift from happening, to regain control of his wolf, Khrysoar. "But you are what I need. Just by being with you, that hole felt like it was being filled up," Ryker said this out loud, not to me, but to himself or maybe to his wolf because the next thing I knew his face went back to his skin side. "So please give us a chance." He raised his hand up so his fingertip almost brushed my lips. I could feel the electricity from his almost touch tingling my lips.

"I—" I swallowed the lie I was going to tell him and decided to come forward with the truth instead. "I'm sorry, but as much I want to, I don't trust you."

I could see hurt and pain in those gorgeous silver eyes and I felt my own heart hurting.

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Dear Readers, don't fret, this isn't the end. This is just the beginning of these two opening up and truly hearing each other out (instead of avoiding and ignoring each other lol)