The Deal I Made With Theodore Nott - NL x TN

25

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I could feel my eyes getting heavy, but I was fighting it.

"You are sleepy again, aren't you?" Theo asked as he played with my hair.

"You remember that night? After we got stuck in the potions closet?" I asked, the memories flooding my mind with the night we spent in the Slytherin common room.

A broad smile grew on Theo's face.
"Yeah, you were so awkward." He laughed.

"Shove off, I was not!" I scoffed as I playfully bumped him.
"Blaise said you got Spider-Man comics after that, is that true?"

"Oh yeah, I owled auntie Andy! She was quick about it too, she said her husband reads all kinds of comics." Theo answered excitedly.

"Why- why would you read my favorite book?"

Theo looked down at me and let out a curt laugh.
"I think I've made it pretty obvious that I fancy you-"

"No- I only mean." I wasn't even sure what I was asking. I sounded slightly strange when I really thought about it.
"Well Pansy said you've fancied me since first year. That can't be true right?"

He didn't answer.

I sat up and looked down at him, he avoided my eyes while appearing the most embarrassed I've ever seen him. To think I had just seen his cock and here he was blushing at the reveal of his childhood crush.

"Really? Why?" I asked, a cheeky smile playing at my lips.

Theo pulled his blanket over his face, like a child would when they pretended it was an invisibility cloak.

"Theo, Cmon!" He chimed and I playfully pulled at the cover.

"First year, when Dumbledore was announcing which house had won. I'd become close with Pansy and Blaise that year, we were all vibrating with anticipation and pride. Then Dumbledore said your name."

Theo spoke with a fondness in his voice. It wasn't just that, it was how he told the story. It was as if he had gone over it in his head a million times before.
It was such a clear memory.

"He said 'It takes a great deal of bravery to stand up to our enemies, but just as much to stand up to our friends.' Theo continued, he had dropped down the blanket away from his face. His expression now melancholy.
"Draco was good once, as good as any of us were capable of being. But he changed that year, and I promised myself I wouldn't do the same. I told myself I'd be good so that when I looked in the mirror I'd see someone worth while."

He looked towards me again, his expression changing back to content. He rubbed the back of his knuckles across my cheek and I melted into his touch.
"Everyday since then, whenever I was in a hard situation I'd always ask myself, what would Neville do?"

"Liar." I scoffed with a grin.

"No really, you were everything I wanted to be. A good friend, brave-"

"Hardly."

Theo abruptly grabbed my face, turning me towards him. He looked in my eyes as he spoke.
"Stop doing that! Looking down on yourself and comparing yourself to others. Stop acting like you aren't the most amazing person in the world. Because you are to me."

My heart swelled at his words.
Theodore Nott cared for me, he cared for me deeply. I'd never even imagine such a thing a year ago and yet here I was. Then I felt nervous.
Nervous because of these new feelings I now had, ones that went beyond a crush.

"Alright alright." I chuckled, trying to play off my internal crisis.

"Good." Theo proudly stated as he laid back again, a wide grin on his face.

I laid back down with him, pressing my body as close as I could.
"You know, when I was younger I used to try to be just like my father. I thought the sun rose and set for my parents, that's the way my nan made them out to be. But I didn't know my parents, I don't have any way of knowing what choices they would have made in my situation. They could have been assholes for all I know."

"Neville-"

"Why do our parents decide our fate? Why can't we just be who we want?" I asked.

"I dunno." Theo sighed, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me close. He laid his cheek against the top of my head.
"I don't know Neville."

That was the last thing he said before falling asleep again. I felt slightly guilty I had worked him up so much while he was healing but I also was elated to be lying here in his arms. If our life was made up of small moments like this, I didn't care if no one knew.

I was so used to hiding, I was fine with it.

Right?

The feelings I had attempted to push away before came back in full swing.
I wasn't just falling for Theo, I was in love with him.

With Theo I didn't have to worry about hiding or pretending, I was myself. I was addicted to that feeling, but that wasn't the only thing I was
addicted to.

I was also fully infatuated with the wizard.

Anyone could tell Theodore Nott was an attractive bloke, but he was more than that. He was smart, sensitive, and thoughtful. He held his friends close and was exceptionally loyal. He listened to me when I spoke, no matter how lame the plant fact I rambled on about.

He held a confidence I could never think to achieve and yet he made me feel like i'm his equal.

I never wanted to lose him, I never wanted to part from him. Yet our time ticked on and I was anticipating the clock running out. It always did, and it always will.