Check Up [Style-South Park]

Sweet.

Kyle looks at me and smiles softly. Yet, he seems nervous.
"Uhmmm... I'm just gonna try and clean as much as I can off my jacket..." He nervously chuckles before leaving the room quickly.
From downstairs, I hear my mom speak. "Ugh, Randy, I'm doing the dishes. Can you go help Stanley?"

My dad groans.
"Gahl! Sharon, I'm searching up about how the Japanese make people gay!"
My mom turns off the sink, I can hear the water stop.
"Randy, you know damn well that's not how it works. Plus, that was months ago! Some people are gay, so what? I don't care why, I'm just glad they're happy!" She snaps at him before returning to do the dishes.
My dad is going to go fucking wild if he finds out about my feelings for Kyle.

I hear him come up the stairs.
"Staaaaaaaan? Are you okay?"
He yells.

"Y-Yeah. I just threw up. My friend's in the bathroom trying to get my sick off of their jacke-"

"WHO?!"

My dad cuts me off.
"Hmmm.... Well, someone's a man now, huh? Crushes and everything. Moving on from the ol' Testaburger... Who is this new girlie?"
Oh right, he knows about how I throw up near people I like.

I stare at him.

"Actually, it's just Kyle."
I answer after a moment of silence.

"Oh god, the Japanese made you gay too?"
He gasps dramatically.

"No, dad, the Japanese don't make people gay. God does. I guess. If there even is a god..."
I tell him. He seems absolutely fucking perplexed. Flabbergasted.

"They- They don't?"
My dad mumbles, shocked.

I roll my eyes and scoff.
"Can you just help me clean this shit, dad?"