Regret

Confusion

Kim Dan let out a loud exhale, his breathing was loud and heavy. His body had barely stopped shaking and he couldn't figure out what to do next. Was he supposed to hate Jaekyung now..? Should he go apologize?- No, thatll just make him even more mad..but why did he just leave like that? Maybe he was just tired of me..I mean- who can blame him...Kim dan felt awfully guilty and his self esteem was extremely low.

He slowly brought himself up with the support of his hands pushing off the floor, his legs trembled and he quickly gripped onto the sink for support when he was up.  He was limping and could barely walk. Tears were still silently trickling down from his eyes. He slowly took a step and turned his head towards the mirror. He cringed when he saw the state he was in.

Blood, bruises, injuries, fear, trauma..all this, and yet he still tried to find excuses and reasonings for jaekyung as for why he did that... 'still tried to justify his behaviour.

Kim Dan hated how..how..fuck. He hated how everytime Jaekyung fucked up, Kim Dan always came up with excuses. No matter how hurt Dan was, he still thought of it from Mr. Joo's perspective and understood why he did it. Then, he just stayed quiet and suffered in silence.

Something about how straight forward Jaekyung is, make kim dan seek his approval. If Jaekyung didn't like someone, he wouldn't hesitate to be open about it, unlike him. Kim Dan just wanted Jaekyungs artention. He wasn't exactly sure why, but he couldn't help but want his love.

Its very rare for h to ever be affectionate, probably impossible, but Kim Dan wanted..ugh..what was he even thinking..Whatever..

Kim Dan took his sweet time making his way to his bedroom, he decided to just leave Jaekyung to cool off, and then next morning he would apologize by making him a nice breakfast. He didn't even bother cleaning himself up. He was way too tired and exhausted to care if he stained Jaekyungs white sheets, blood red, he could worry about that in the morning.

He collapsed with a sigh onto the bed, immidiatley feeling at ease.  He turned to shut the lamp which was so only source of light, and got under the covers.  He laid his head on the soft, fat pillow and got comfy.  He felt so relieved to feel this comfort
and finally get some much needed rest.

                           •The Next Morning•

Beep!...Beep!...Beep!...

Kim dan rolled over and groaned softly at the disruption of his sleep. He blinked his eyes open and saw that it was 7:30AM. He didn't want to get up but he had too, or else..he wouldn't be able to make Mr.Joo that breakfast..Ugh. He didn't even want to think about last night, it made his stomach drop.

He didn't want too, but he kicked the sheets off of him and groggily got up. He was so tired. When he exited the blanket, he felt a wave of coldness wash over him, he shivered and glanced around, he was still wearing his usual clothes since last night, blue t shirt and grey pants with a grey zip up hoodie, but he didn't want to wear that hoodie..it reminded him of unwanted memories..plus it was covered in blood.

He wondered if it would be okay if he borrowed one of Jaekyungs hoodies..it would be fine, right..? He wouldn't get that mad...

He really didn't want too, he was terrified of just the thought of Jaekyung, but he was shivering, freezing cold. He doesn't know why, maybe because of his low iron..

He cautiously, slowly walked towards his room, trying to be as quiet as possible. When he reached his door, he twisted the knob quietly first, and then, as he was trembling his fear, he pushed the door open, soundlessly.

He found Jaekyung asleep on his bed under his blankets..he looked so..peaceful.... Whatever. He slowly tip toed towards his closet that was thankfully already opened and ran thru the hangers carefully and silently to see if he could find anything. He came across a plain navy blue sweatshirt and quickly took it off of the hanger, he clutched it in his hand and made his way out, shutting the door behind him slowly.

When he exited, he let out a loud exhale. That was fucking terrifying. Who knew walking into a closet and grabbing a sweatshirt could be so nerve-racking. He slid the sweatshirt on and it was so comfy..he immediately felt relief with the soft fleece on the inner part of the sweat shirt. He made his way to the kitchen, opened the fridge and examined what he had to work with. He took out all the ingredients he needed to make a crepe. He decided not to add too much sweets, as Jaekyung was very healthy, so he would just add strawberries, blue berries and the smallest amount of chocolate chips. He had known how to make this because his grandma used to teach him, they couldn't afford any toppings or anything, so they just ate it plain. He decided to make some coffee too.

*~~~~~*

A/N: Thank you guys all so much for all the support! My apologies for the long wait of this chapter, but thank you for your patience. I never really expected people to like this story, but i'm so grateful it did! I felt a pang in my chest writing this 😭 but there's gonna be a happy ending. I'm excited to write future chapters and hope you enjoyed this one!