Ishq-Meerasim Tales

His insecurities

Meerab tossed and turned on the bed unable to sleep. She had slept for 3 hours in the afternoon and now she became an night owl.

Meerab sighed. She got up from bed and sat on the sofa. Everything was too quite for her. She subconsciously started to thought about their life.

It's been 3 months since their wedding and first month was a disaster. She would make him angry, do everything that he hates. But he handled her with patience, fulfilled her every wish. Even went to bring an admission form of law school.

She went on the bed and sat there looking at him intensely. Her husband was good looking. She had to admit it. His sharp nose and perfectly trimmed bread. Eye catching jawline. His board shoulder, narrow waist veiny hands. Damn!

Suddenly she felt he was shifting and shivering. He was really uncomfortable in that buttoned up shirt. So she hesitantly opened his top two buttons. Still he kept murmuring. Initially it was something incorhent. But slowly she understands it.

"Baba don't leave me please. Why? Please. No. Don't take her with you. Don't take her. I ... I can't live. Meerab . Not Meerab please. Please... Meerab!!" He screamed her name and got up. But not fully aware of his surroundings. He was panting and kept murmuring.

Finding no other option, Meerab hugged him tightly. She rubbed his back continously but seems like he was just in another world.

"Murtasim,  look at me. I am fine. Nothing happened to me. Your Meerab is all good. Calm down." Meerab said as she hold his face. Her Murtasim was having a nightmare and it was his fear to loose her.

"Don't leave me please. I will do whatever you say, whatever you say but I won't be able to live without you." He was vulnerable and it was killing her.

"I am not going anywhere. Believe me, no matter how much I fight with you, you are just mine. I will never leave you." Meerab assured him.

"Promise?" He was scared.

"Promise."She put his head on her lap and stroked his soft hairs.

"Murtasim?" It's been a while and he didn't say anything just kept quite.

"Yes." He was still in a daze. He was still processing the whole fact.

"Don't you feel sleepy?" She asked to divert her mind.

"No. Are you? Then sleep. I will figure out something." He replied in an attempt to get up.

"Why are getting up? Stay right there. Let's just gossip. Like we used to." Meerab smiled at those memories.

"You want to talk to me?" he couldn't believe his ears. Meerab who always ran away from any type of conversation, was willing to talk to him.

"Yes. If you are comfortable."

"I am always. Its just I am scared you know."

"Why so? And you are taking too much stress. Its not necessary. What's the point?" Meerab rubbed his forehead only to him to sigh.

"Baba came in my dreams." He whispered.

"We often dream what we think about. It's not always a sign of something. Don't stress."

"I showed him my camera and he.. he took away. He told me to handle these feudal duties. Trust me.. I never wanted this. I.. I wanted to be a wildlife international photographer. You know right? I told you."

"Yes Murtasim I know. You used to click so beautiful pictures. I saw them. It's okay." Meerab tried to calm her hyper husband down.

"Baba took away my camera. Then I saw you. You were by my side. But suddenly you went to Baba. You hold his hand and disappeared. Meerab I know you don't love me. But please don't leave me. I know I am being selfish but it just becomes impossible to imagine a life without you. You don't have to love me. I will love enough for both of us. Just stay please." He was sweating and shivering. Meerab hold him close to herself hugging him to death. He needed her. Her Murtasim needed her. She never knew he was fighting with this much. Her own battles seemed to be small before his ones.