Broken Love

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K A R E E M ' S P O V

"I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE! All she does is ignore me every time she sees me. She acts as if- as if I'm the enemy to her. Why can't she just-," I stutter on my words, causing me to feel more flushed and embarrassed.

"Kareem, calm down," Pastor Daniel interrupts my rant before removing his glasses to wipe them before putting them back on. "Remember what we said about anger."

My hands unclenched as I collapsed onto the red sofa, a wave of exhaustion coming over me. All my mind could think about was Chloe and her hurt face and everything I had done that ruined our relationship. I couldn't even sleep at night without her brown eyes painted on my mind, invading all my thoughts.

"Remember, you told me about everything in your relationship. She's not in the best mood to talk to you right now. Not after everything that happened."

"But why can't she let me apologize and just forgive me already?" My voice raises with every word, the frustration in my tone more evident.

"She's mad at you, Kareem. But right now I think your biggest concern should be focusing on yourself, not her. She needs the time right now. You, on the other hand, need to focus on what's most important right now. Spending time with Jesus. Have you been reading the book of John like I asked you to?"

"Kinda, I guess." I add a shrug at the end of my sentence.

He raises an eyebrow causing me to sigh under my breath as he crosses his arms.

"Fine, I didn't but you can't blame me. I've been busy at the rec and my mom is mad at me! I got other things to do y'know. " I run my hand through my hair, already knowing how much of an idiot I sounded.

"Kareem, as much as I would like to help you, you need to read the Word. Because no matter how many times you come to my office and ask me questions, you can't ignore the fact that you need the Word of God. That's the only solution. Not me, not Chloe. Not even your Mom."

We stay silent for a while as he stares me down, uncrossing his arms as his face softens. "I really believe that you can do it, Kareem. You can overcome the pain and trauma you've experienced in life. The Word will help you overcome that, okay?"

"Yes sir," I mutter, kicking my foot at the carpeted floor before looking at my phone. It was half past noon, the bleak winter sun outside shining on the city and passing through the windows. "I gotta bounce."

"Okay then. You'll be here at church tomorrow right though?"

"Sure."

With that, I put on my jacket and leave his office before leaving through the oak doors of the church that led into the outside world. Heading into my car, I stare outside into the small window Pastor Dan had in his office before starting up the car and leaving the church parking lot. The usual noon traffic caused cars to be lined up on the roads with beeps and honks were heard everywhere. Annoyed at the sound, I turn on the radio knob, only to hear Nikki Minaj's voice, and turned it off. I couldn't go home, that I knew. I couldn't stay in this traffic either. I was tired, but not sleepy. Annoyed but not in the mood to punch anything. My emotions were all over the place and it wasn't helping that she was still stuck in my mind, her beautiful face masked under worry and deep bags under her eyes.