Vox Machina Incorrect Quotes

Not incorrect quotes, but this is fucking hilarious

Okay, so for some context, a while ago, I started writing a Vox Machina chatfic.

And then I forgot about it.

And I'm rereading the first chatfic part and...oh my god

I was fucking dying

Worst/Best part is that I can hear it in their voices. Especially Percy's.

And now, since I doubt I'll ever finish the chatfic, here's a texting part between Percy and Keyleth. You're welcome in advance.

And no, you don't need to know anything about them or their dynamic. It's not exactly relevant here.

~<•>~

Brother From Another Mother <3
October 31st
8:52am

Keyleth: Hey!!!!
Keyleth: my roommate's friend's roommate is throwing a costume party for Halloween
Keyleth: Do you wanna come with me?
Keyleth: she said that anyone is allowed to come

Percy: hm...
Percy: Who is throwing the party?

Keyleth: I think his name is Shorthalt
Keyleth: or something like that

Percy: I think I know him, actually
Percy: kind of
Percy: he plays at some bar a few blocks away on Thursdays
Percy: he's pretty good, actually
Percy: didn't know your roommate knew him

Keyleth: well, she doesn't REALLY know him
Keyleth: she met him once when she was returning her friend's things
Keyleth: Vex says that he's apparently a player tho

Percy: I wasn't aware that you knew Vex

Keyleth: Oh yeah, she's one of my classmates! I don't know her all that well, but we talk kinda!

Percy: That's...shocking. She's not really a people person. She's even told me that I'm her only friend besides her brother

Keyleth: SHE HAS A BROTHER???

Percy: yeah. She has a twin brother named Vax. He's actually my roommate.

Keyleth: pics or it didn't happen

Percy: ...what
Percy: Keyleth, I can't just take a picture of my roommate
Percy: for one, that's really creepy, and for another, I hardly know the guy.
Percy: we're hardly ever in the same place at the same time

Keyleth: If you loved me, you'd send me pics 🥺

Percy: I hate you so much
Percy: [image sent]

Keyleth: oh wow
Keyleth: it's literally a boy Vex

Percy: yes, Keyleth
Percy: that's how twins work

Keyleth: shut up!!!
Keyleth: Are you coming or not?

Percy: fine, I'll come

Keyleth: YAY!!!! :D

~<•>~

Lowkey, my favorite part is "yes Keyleth. That's how twins work." It's so fucking funny for no reason.

Tho that might partly be bc I'm very tired. It's like 1:30am rn.