Once I felt better, Lily went down to the drug store to pick something up. She came back up and I offered her choice of TV channel. She offered me a pregnancy test. I said no thanks but could I please have a milkshake.
"Robin."
"Lily."
"I've been pregnant, this is morning sickness."
"I CAN'T HAVE CHILDREN LILY."
"FALSE NEGATIVE, ROBIN"
"No."
"Yes."
"No."
"Just pee on the frickn stick Robin"
"Ugggggghhhhh fiiiiiiiiinnnnneeeeeee"
I know I'm not pregnant, right?
I pee on the stick. I wait. I'm scared to look. What if it's positive? What do I tell Barney? I don't want a child! They're... Messy. I could abort the child. Wait. I'm getting ahead of myself. Lily is wrong. I'm sure... Aren't I?
