Within you I found home

thirty one

        Forever an outsider.

        "I did believe you." Nico's eyes were red, but his face remained pinched with fury. "I fucking – I put you above my pack. My own Alpha. I was ready to go against his word and-" he broke off, shaking his head and demanded, "Tell me why you did it."

        "I didn't." Your voice broke along with something inside of you.

        Nico snapped, and he tugged you forward forcefully, shouting in your face with such force that you flinched. "Stop lying to me!"

        "Don't yell at her like that!" Mithun shouted, voice breaking. He was angry, too. "Let her go! She didn't do it! Get off me!"

        Mith wanted Aerilyn off him. She wasn't listening. You went into mother bear mode and snapped your head around to them.

        The blonde was still on the bed but now with her legs swung over the edge. Her arms wrapped tightly around Mithun as she murmured to him.

        "Get the fuck off of my son!" you growled, struggling, but Nico wouldn't let you go, either. You were both overpowered.

        "Mom," he whimpered with tears in his eyes.

        Uncontainable rage surged through you. Your boy needed you, and they were standing in the way. You tried your hardest to pull yourself out of Nico's hold. "Get off me, Nico! He needs me!"

        Betrayal stabbed you when he only held you tighter, going as far as to wrap his other arm around your waist and pick you up. Your feet left the floor, and it was your turn to scream as he carried you from the room.

        Mith called your name again. Shaky. Scared.

        Your chest ached, and you fought with everything you had. "Fuck you, Nico! I thought I could trust you! How could you do this to me? Let me go – I need to get to my son!"

         He ignored your demands.

        "The only place you're going is the cells." His voice was cold. Oh, so cold. His words penetrate you like shards of ice. "And until you start telling the truth, it's where you will stay."

--

        "Nico, please," you plead, whimpering.

        He tugged you down a long passage inside a cave just left of the main one you'd dined at not so long ago. The entrance was small and angular, reminding you of a lightning bolt. It was just wide enough to fit Nico's bulky frame with you dragging closely behind.

        It was dark. Lanterns were few and far between. You tripped up, barely managing to stay upright.

        "I didn't do it," you whispered desperately. It was an awful feeling. Helplessness. You'd never felt so weak before.

        You were going to be locked away. Away from Mith. Away from everything you loved. And there was nothing you could do to stop it.

        "I don't know why she recognises me!" You attempted to tug your hand from his hold but achieved nothing. He was too strong. "Please, Nico! You know me!"

         He span round suddenly, voice wrecked as he roared his retort. "I thought I did!"

         It echoed through the cave, taunting you.

        You flinched, not having expected a response. He'd spent the entire journey here ignoring you—ignoring the stares from his pack, too.

        "You do." It was a pathetic attempt, but you had nothing left to give. "You know me better than anyone else."

        He was your first in many things. Didn't he see how special he was to you, for you to trust him that way?

        There was a light glow on his face from a faraway light. He was hurting—you could see it all over his expression, and you thought bitterly: at least I'm not the only one.

        "She has no reason to lie," he said through his teeth.

        Your expression crumbled. "Nico, please. You have to believe me." You couldn't believe this was how you would say it, but you had to. It might be your only hope. "I wouldn't lie to you. I lov-"

        "Don't!" he gritted out, hand gripping you tighter. His nostrils flared, neck strained. "Don't – don't mess with my head like that."

         A sob escaped you. "I'm no-"

        Nico's face twisted in anguish. "Enough!" he ordered, but it came across as weak despite the raised voice. "Enough now."

        And just like that, he was dragging you back down the damp passageway.

        It didn't take long to reach the cells. The narrow path opened to a large room with a lantern dangling from the ceiling. Grooves lined the wall before you as if someone had taken a giant scoop and carved out prison cells before slapping bars on the front.

        Nico marched you over to the first one and – not as gently as you'd have hoped – chucked you inside before slamming the door shut behind you.

        You didn't watch him go, wanting to spare yourself that, at least.

        When his footsteps disappeared, a shiver ran through you, and you hugged yourself.

        The cells were cold. No fire. No warmth. The light barely touched your prison, leaving the corners dark and hidden.

         Your vision was blurry with tears, but you could make out a bedroll and bucket without squinting. A few spaces down, a wolf howls.

        Frail, out of tune. You wondered if they'd gone mad.

        You couldn't believe it'd come to this.

        Your stomach twisted. Heart throbbed. You were terrified. You didn't know if you'd ever see your son again. Would he be ok without you?

         He should be. He was with his people. He had settled in so well here and made friends. They'd look after him, surely. He'd be fine. Sore for a while but fine. The thought comforts you, but another one almost wrenched you sideways – would he grow to believe Aerilyn and hate you too?

       It made you want to puke—the idea that he was likely hearing her side of the story right now, and you had no way to defend yourself.

        Then again – what would you even say? You had no explanation for this. You never attacked her. You never stole Mithun. You rescued him. It was Jessa who saw him first.

         . . .she wouldn't have lied, would she?

        Your heart said no, but your brains said: she'd always wanted kids. Could she have knowingly taken Mithun to help you raise him? Could Jessa have attacked her and been mistaken for you?

        No, that didn't make sense. You looked nothing alike.

         Feeling dizzy and foggy, you plopped down on the bedroll, which was so thin you might as well have been sitting on the stone floor.

        And then you cried.