The Spirit Walker

Chapter Eighteen: The Ride

The tall, dark man stares out the window to the busy docks, declining to engage.

A charged, uncomfortable silence settles over the table.

"My choice is irrelevant?" I ask, incredulously, finding my voice, after several beats.

Has his kindness and consideration all been a charade, after all?

Calum lets out a harsh breath that flares his nostrils wide, and shakes his head. "That is not..." He sighs again, "Of course your choice matters, Raelyn, but..." he cuts himself off.

"Stop trying to spare her," Arran deigns to say at long last, looking down his nose at me with disdain. "An echo of the bond lasts, even after the rejection. You'll never be free of each other. You'll always belong to each other, whether you like it or not."

I swing my gaze to Elder Diyani. "I thought you said it was like an amputation, not..."

"I told you there would be phantom pains. We can fight destiny all we like, but it is not so easily evaded," she replies, smoothly.

Silence descends once more. Calum's jaw is clenched, his gaze out the floor-to-ceiling window to the river.

I abruptly realize that by not correcting Ness, I have inadvertently hurt him. In the same moment, I realize that I actually like him. As a person. He is a good man- patient, and kind, and strong. A little mischievous, too. He's cocky, but everyone has their flaws.

Most importantly, I know he would never hurt me. If I allow it, he will spend the rest of his life keeping me safe from men like Master.

I could do a lot worse.

"Honestly, it doesn't make much of a difference, anyway," I admit, softly, my gaze lowered to the table. I force my eyes up to meet Calum's, and swallow hard, before forcing the words out of my dry throat. "I'm not going to reject you."

His face lights up like a little boy on Christmas morning. His giddiness is contagious; I can't help but to smile in response.

Ness, on the other hand, looks like she swallowed a lemon. Arran looks equally displeased; he scowls into his cup with eyes like thunder. I do my best to ignore them both.

"You're sure?" Calum asks.

The moment feels too heavy, the commitment too intense. It's like I'm agreeing to an arranged marriage with someone I barely know. I try to lighten the mood, if only a little bit.

"So long as you don't do something truly egregious, like, I don't know, force me to eat cheesecake..."

"Spirits forbid," Calum deadpans, trying and failing to keep a straight face.

I snort.

Calum's hazel eyes are warm, his expression soft. The eye contact between us lingers longer than what is necessarily socially appropriate in such a public setting, and the temporarily muted bond sings its way to life between us. The air thickens, and the pepper and pine is suddenly so potent I can taste it on my tongue.

"Wonderful. As soon as she shifts, you'll be humping like rabbits. Congratulations on the near-end of your dry spell," Ness mutters, cutting through the fog, and my face flames.

Calum rolls his eyes, seemingly unbothered by her vulgarity, and wipes his big hands off on his napkin.

I am mesmerized by the movement of his fingers- long and beautifully shaped and thick. I find myself wondering what sorts of things those fingers can do...

Ness groans again, loudly, and I jerk my gaze away from those stupid, distracting hands. I glance up at Calum, and he winks at me.

I don't think it's possible for my cheeks to get any redder.