𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄 𝐎𝐅 𝐈𝐓 | 𝟏𝟖+

31 | lukewarm heart

"You should eat something, Lex. Get your strength up." And then he's gone.

I close my eyes and drift back into a dreamless sleep, even though my stomach is growling painfully–I don't think I can stomach anything right now.

✧✧✧

After a few hours of sleep and then picking at the food Gabriel brought up and then another nap, I wake to find myself panting. Not that I remember any dreams but because I've been in this room for far too long and I need to get out.

My windpipe feels like it's being crushed and I can't stand being in here for a second longer.

I push off the covers and stumble to the door, desperate to grab my coat and head outside for some fresh air. Any air that isn't in here because it's intoxicating my lungs and I feel like I can't catch my breath.

My hands fumble with the coats on the hanger, multiple falling off at once but I curse to myself when I can't find the one I want. It's beyond freezing outside and I know that I'll go into shock if I stand there in nothing but my pyjamas, especially after being in a warm bed all day and night.

I locate my nearest coat and shove it onto my arms, stumbling into the wall.

Everything tightens harshly and I lean forward for the door handle.

"Alexia?"

Lonzo's voice floats from the top of the stairs and I can't even look over at him because tears have now clouded my vision. I'm pretty much wheezing at this point. Pathetic. Such a pathetic woman.

"What's going on?"

Now he's at my side and grips my arm and when I turn to look at him, his eyes roam my face to see that I'm in obvious distress.

"I-I," I gasp. "I need to–go outside. Air. Fresh air."

"Alright, alright," he leans for his own coat. He's dressed down in a suit, no doubt working in his office late. Although I know neither of them left today, he still dresses up for some unknown reason.

I swallow down a breath and glance into his dark brown eyes. "A walk. I-I want to go for a walk."

He drags his eyes down my attire and frowns. Bare legs and a coat that barely covers my thighs. I watch him as he walks across the room to grab two pairs of shoes, my knee high flat boots and his own. "Put these on."

I don't protest, I slide them on and Lonzo taps away on his phone quickly.

We exit the house and walk around the back, only for two guards to follow behind us but far enough that it doesn't feel like they're stalking us. I don't care because as soon as the fresh cool air hits my lungs, it's like I can breathe again.

I have no idea what happened after I woke up from my nap but it felt paralysing, like I was trapped in a trance and I am forced to remember what happened last night. But I shake these from my thoughts and focus on my breathing, on the freezing cold air.

Lonzo watches me out of the corner of his eye as we approach the lake, it has now frozen over because the temperature has plummeted. I barely feel the cold, that's because I already feel so numb to everything else.

"We shouldn't stay out here for long," he comments as we pause by the edge of the lake, not close enough to fall in. "You'll freeze out here, principessa."

I chew on my lip and glance across the frozen block of ice. So beautiful. So gracious.

That's one thing I'm grateful for since I've lived here, how beautiful everything around this house is. I could only imagine how stunning it is in spring and then nostalgic in summer. It reminds me of home–I don't even think I can call it home anymore.