7/4) Hero Or Villain: Matty, Ten Years Old

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The beginning of the end of Matthew Sr. began in the same barn where he killed Matty's puppy five years earlier. Things had not improved in those years. In fact, Matty's mom was inside the house in bed nursing some bruised ribs on the day Matty's dad met his maker.

His last day on earth was a typical drinking day for Matthew, Sr. It was his third typical day in a row. He was on a bender and currently found himself without his next drink. Demand was currently well ahead of supply. After crashing around the barn loft for a half an hour looking, he found a jug filled with what he thought was some moonshine. What he did not know or care about was that the moonshine from this batch, purchased from the Mahoney brothers two counties over last month, was more methanol than alcohol. It had already blinded two men and killed one. The Mahoney brothers were sitting in jail in Asheville awaiting a judge visit. Matthew Sr. had not heard the news. He drank up.

Three hours later, Matty came home from school. "Well, he's really tying one on today," Matty thought. Matthew, Sr. was screaming and staggering around the yard.

"What the world?" thought Matty. "He's going to fall in the river."

Matthew, Sr. was yelling for help. He was falling over rocks and old tires and other obstacles in the yard.

"Over here," Matty yelled.

Matty watched his dad stumble towards him with arms swinging back and forwards and sideways. He looks kind of like a windmill, Matty thought, or a big pair of scissors.

Matthew, Sr. stopped, he listened. "Boy come to me. You're too near the river. I can hear it. It's way up."

"Ok, daddy, I'll walk, you walk and we'll meet. Follow my voice."

Matty did not move.

As his father neared him, Matty stepped aside.

And then after years of Matty praying he would, he did. Daddy fell in the river.

"Help me," Daddy screamed as he tumbled down the embankment and into the river. "I can't see. I can't see." He clutched at some reeds.

Matty did not help him. He watched as his daddy lost his footing. He watched as Big Matt went down the river. Matty felt nothing. Nothing but relief.


People might believe Matty did not kill his father, but Matty believed he was responsible. He was with his dad when he brought the moonshine from the Mahoney brothers, but more importantly, he heard the news about their arrest a week ago. He never told his dad. He did not warn him. His mama hid the liquor like always, but Matty put the moonshine out where it would be found with a little looking. When his dad asked Matty for help, he did not say, "Watch out" or "This way" or "Here, let me help you." He stepped out of the way and let a man step into death. Matty never thought of himself as a bad guy until this day. Initially, he did not feel bad about what happened. Matty felt only relief because he knew when someone gets there goes around, comes around, it evens things up in the world. Things were even now.

It was time to take his mom to town and get the new dress she always wanted.


In the years following, Matty did not think much of himself or his decision to stand by and watch his blinded father fall in the river. As a teenager he led a brash, reckless, harum-scarum existence. He was never thinking of consequences or tomorrow. He ran with a bad crowd until he became the bad crowd. Even his own mother said he had become "the bad influence" other mothers were warning their kids about, though she never said what she probably needed to - that he was turning into his father's son.

There were brushes with the law. Matty did not like this lifestyle or this new Matty. He did not feel like he was doing right by his mom. He felt shame. He was looking for a way to change and escape, when what he thought was the FBI came to town to discreetly recruit. He was looking for a change in his life. He grasped tightly for this lifeline and chance at a new life and never let go. Matty longed to be a hero and not a villain.


Author's Note: In the days of prohibition and moonshine, thousands died or were blinded by methanol poisoning.

Shout out to my friend Wendy and her saying when something is unbelievable - "What the world?"


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