The Other Brother

My day has been going smoothly, nothing hectic. Just work after work. I decided to call Thabi but her phone is taking me staring to voicemail. She will get back to me if she wants to. I cannot run after an old bloody woman who refuses to think like an adult. She knows she left me behind. She should have had the decency to update me at least. A text will never do any harm. I log in on to my Facebook just to pass time. I am waiting for my knock off time. No new trends. I am just bored by it honestly. Maybe it’s the people I am friends with. Khanyi blocked me that I know. I scrolled to a list of people you may know. I know none, don’t know why Facebook would suggest these people to me. A particular picture captures my eyes. I view the account and damn this Amanda chick is doing waves in Durban. I look at her picture and I find myself smiling. There's is this thing about her. I decided to send her a friend request. I continue looking at her pictures. A lot of them she is with Khanyi. These two love each other in a very weird way. I logged out. I find myself holding my beating chest. 
“Woah.” I say standing up. I look around trying to see if I am leaving anything behind. All good and set. I lock Thabi’s office and head out. It's high time I got a car of my own. My lessons in the driving school are coming along just fine. I can safely say I hold the steering wheel better than other days. Today I will not be taking any lessons, I'm just tired. I want to watch the game. 

Arriving home, I find my brother sweeping the yard. Why is he sweeping this late?
“The rents are not yet back?” I ask.
“No, looks like they will be sleeping out. You should have seen your mother gloating right in my face. I know you are the course of this.” I just laugh at him and walk past. He is crazy. How am I the course of my mother going gaga on him. Let me just annoy her. I call her phone and she doesn’t pick up. I wonder what these old people are getting up to. I try once more, and she picks up. 
“Yini!” See what I mean She is galled by my call. 
“Where are you? There is no food in the house.” I lie. I know there is food. This woman would never leave her house without ensuring that there is food for her two grown ass kids. 
“Ask your wife to cook for you. Don’t call me.” With that said she drops the call on me. Yah neh just for one day this woman has grown horns. I shake my head and throw my phone aside. I have to think of a better way to invest my money. My brother comes back and throws himself next to me. 
“I need money.” 
“You are not even asking. I told you there are vacancies at work. We are looking for drivers.” 
“You want your brother to drive tourist around?” He asks. Will he not get paid at the end of the day? I will not give him any money. Uyangibhedela lona. My mother has spoiled him way too much. 
“I don’t have money. I sponsored your mother's trip.” 
“Transnet is hiring and...” 
“Uzogwaza ngeyakho imali. Not my hard-earned money." I stood up and left him seated. I don’t understand my brother at times. I think the option for me to stay in my father's yard will need to change. I am throwing that mindset out of the window. My brother is starting to annoy me in a way. He just enjoys sitting around and not doing anything. He wants everything to be handed to him. Tell me about a grown ass man who can't even clean his own bedroom. 

AMANDA

Khanyi did not show up for the grocery shopping. She just sent me money and told me to buy what is missing. She mentioned something about abdominal pains. Will have to check up on her later on. Maybe she will be on periods soon or better, yet she is already on them. 
It’s just those basic stuff that we need other than that we are fine with food. I also added some of the things I need too, I know she will not mind. The change is five hundred. I think my mother will make good use of this money. After paying for these items. Will have to pass by Pep and send her money. Hope it will be enough for her. I hate it that I have to steal out of my friend's pocket to feed me and my mother. She doesn’t complain or rather say she hasn’t complained about it. I am sure once she notices and gets tired, she will burst out.  As humans we all have our days where we just get fed up and throw a towel. Hope our relationship does not come to that point. I know it’s one sided, but I pray that one day I get to give her a surprise for life. Something she will hold on to even in her grave. I sigh deeply anticipating whether to put this money through or not. She sent me one thousand five hundred. Hope she understands someday. I just pray that she doesn’t ask for any change. I pay for the food stuffs and run straight to pep. Luckily this time around their network is not offline. I stand by the door and send her numbers. I will call her when I get to Res. 

What I love about our transport is that it leaves you right in front of the gate. Tired as I am I drag myself with these heavy plastics.
“Need help Nana?” Ask one of the security men. This man is old enough to be my father. The way he likes me reminds me of my own father. I was the apple of his eye. The day he decided to leave us, we were all devastated. But hey life still goes on and we are breathing just fine. Even though sidonsa ngo diesel I believe someday God will see us through. 
“Please. You have no idea how heavy this is.” I say and place the plastics on the ground. He just picks them all three and leaves me with my mouth partially open. Okay old man is strong. He is defiantly a heaven sent. I follow him behind. At least I look decent today. I am wearing my new dress that cost me fifty rand in some shops and fifteen rands flip flops. Tired of those clothes that are now losing color. See what I mean when I say Khanyi feeds and clothes me and my mother unknowingly. I don’t know what I will be or do without her. Thabi once said I should give her a ring whenever I need anything. But I am afraid it’s not easy. Imagine calling someone just because you need something from them. I never call to ask how she is doing. 
“Ngiyabonga baba.” He saved me trouble. If I had money, I would have tipped him. 
He grins and walks away. He never really talks much and that is what I like about him. I also hate conversations with people. I prefer being quiet. Khanyi is the only one that understands me. I can say we know each other deeply. Unpacking our food, I noticed that it was truly a waste buying what I just bought. But hey, guess it will be of good use in the long run. I live alone most of the time and Khanyi she is always out with her man. I think it’s high time I get a man of my own now. I need to call my mother. She picks up on the first ring. I suspect she was waiting for my call. 
“Sanalwami.” Ow this woman always makes me emotional. I miss her so much. But I will be seeing her in two weeks' time. 
“Mama, are you good?” I ask. 
“Talking to you takes all the trouble away.” 
I laugh. She sometimes exaggerates. “Did you see the money I sent you?” I ask. 
“I am even afraid to ask where you got it from.”
“I told you. The little money that I give is the money I steal from the groceries. Sometimes it’s NSFAS.” It’s an honest truth. I would never feed my mother dirty money. 
“The Lord blesses you and keeps you; the Lord makes his face shine on you and be gracious to you; the Lord turns his face toward you and gives you peace. I want you to grow old and experience what happened to the best. I want you to have a golden path. May the lord keep you as long in this world. Blessed my child.”  That is all I wanted to hear from her. Hearing these blessings gives me some type of hope that one day the tears we have been shedding all these years will be wiped with happiness. 

Cooked, washed, cleaned. Bored to death. I can't bring myself to even look at my textbooks. Vele ksasa I am not attending. So might as well relax. Lazing around I decided to check some gossip on Facebook. It’s funny how people have found social media as a platform for bashing another human being. Some people are just mindless in all ways. Nothing interesting. Just old news feed. A notification pops up. A friend request. I am hardly an acceptor. If I liked, you I honor the invite and if I don’t I leave it as it is. 
“Skhosane?” I ask in shock. Maybe this is a dream or something. I scrolled through the account and indeed it’s him. I feel hot flushes pouring out. Okay I shouldn’t get over myself – maybe it’s just a friendly invite. Part of me wants to believe that he has finally noticed me and another part of me believes that this is all a dream. I wish someone could pinch me and wake me up from this reality. 
“So, bae decided to finally recognize me?” I sit on the bed and smile. I held my phone against my chest and let out a sexist laugh. Already I am imagining him proposing to me. Walking around hand in hand show casing me to the world. Having beautiful kids that look exactly like him. Obsession is a funny thing. First and foremost, I think I should start by preparing for my wedding day. I still say. Skhosane is the one meant for me. There is no other man. I get off the bed. There is a file I kept underneath the bed. It’s a file that contains wedding pictures.  Classic wedding theme has always been my favorite. Delicate white florals, plenty of lush greenery, light linens, and minimal décor. In just a few years – this will come to good use. Ow how I wish to be Mrs Skhosane!