Sex & Drugs

Chapter 3.4 - Atlas

I pulled down his pants as he made his way through mine. Considering the amount of time I had done it here, it only took me one more to get the lube from the passenger's side.

I put on a generous amount of lube on my fingers.

As Evan leaned in for a kiss, I could sense his vulnerability, hidden behind his desire to please me. He had always assumed the dominant role in our encounters, preferring to be the top. But after I mentioned that I was a switch, revealing my ability to take on different roles, he expressed a willingness to explore being the bottom, hoping to cater to my desires.

I understood that Evan's eagerness to please stemmed from his genuine care and affection for me. He wanted to create a sense of equality and reciprocity in our sexual dynamics, stepping out of his comfort zone to fulfill my needs. No matter how many times I assured him that his preferences were valid and that I appreciated his efforts, he remained steadfast in his desire to please me.

It was both endearing and frustrating. I admired his willingness to explore new experiences and adapt to my desires, but at the same time, I wished he would prioritize his own wants and needs as well. I didn't want him to feel obligated to conform to my desires just to please me.

Evan's words echoed in my mind, his hopeful expression etched into my memory. He had spoken of equality, of wanting to be on the same level with me, both in our intimate moments and in our social standing. But those words struck a chord within me, stirring a mix of emotions I struggled to comprehend. I wished he hadn't said that because it reminded me of the complexities I grappled with—my inability to fully understand or reciprocate such sentiments.

I yearned for simplicity, for a world where emotions weren't tangled webs I couldn't unravel. Evan's words served as a reminder of the intricacies that lay beneath the surface, a reminder that left me conflicted and unsure of how to navigate the uncharted territory of my own feelings.

I slowly pushed one finger inside, biting and nibbling on his neck, leaving a mark.

As Evan held onto me, trembling from the cold, he didn't ask me to stop. Despite his shakiness, he silently urged me to continue. In that moment, I realized that although I struggled to comprehend my own emotions, Evan sought solace in our physical connection. His unspoken trust spoke volumes, and I couldn't help but feel a mixture of gratitude and confusion. I couldn't fully reciprocate his emotional needs, but he found comfort in my presence nonetheless.

We had done it enough for me to know where to make him feel better so I went straight to that spot, sliding my finger in and out fast enough so that he wouldn't have the time to think about anything else but pleasure.

"Shit," Evan's eyes rolled back. "More. Give me more..."

I pushed my second finger in. Evan moaned, slumping his head on my shoulder. The way his butt moved around my dick was so fucking arousing and I wasn't that high on drugs.

In that moment, I experienced a unique sensitivity, unlike any I had felt before. It was as if Evan had the power to make me feel better without the need for drugs. The connection between us seemed to transcend the need for external substances, and I couldn't help but marvel at the depth of our connection.

Evan had a way of soothing me, offering a solace that went beyond any chemical-induced high.

"I'm ready," Evan bit my ear after I pushed my fourth finger in. He wasn't though so I didn't listen.

I pushed him on the steering wheel, moving my hands as fast as I could.

"Fuck," Evan threw back his head. He then looked over, his eyes glazed over with lust. "It's so embarrassing if- uh, shit!" He suddenly paused mid-sentence as I massaged his inside.

"If you came only from fingering?" I finished it for him, smirking. "Don't worry. It's not like we ever finished after one round."

I leaned toward him, licking his nipples. His hole was still as tight as I remembered but he had slightly loosened up more, enough to let me slowly enter.

"Wait," Evan gasped as my touch neared his entrance. "Let's undress first, both of us."

I could see the flush on his face as I removed his hoodie, already partially raised, and then discarded my own shirt. A sudden change came over Evan, a look in his eyes that eluded my understanding, stirring that unfamiliar sensation within my heart.

"Are those..." Evan's voice quivered, and he hesitated. "Are those marks from someone else? Were you with someone before me?"

Oh. Oh...

This was precisely why I preferred to avoid such entanglements. These moments of emotional confrontation left me at a loss, uncertain of how to respond.

"Come on, Evan," I bit his neck, attempting to shift the focus away from the situation. I wasn't equipped to handle these emotional complexities. "You know what this is between us. Does it truly matter? Let's continue..."

"When?" Evan gasped as I began penetrating him, but I desperately wanted him to forget, to let go of any concerns. My mind, ill-prepared to navigate these emotional territories, struggled once again.

"This morning," I admitted, already halfway inside him. Beads of cold sweat formed on Evan's forehead. I pressed my lips against his, hoping the kiss would ease his tension, but instead, it seemed to intensify his unease.

"Does it matter, though?" I questioned, searching his eyes for answers. Yet, their depths remained elusive, and I found myself unable to comprehend his true intentions. In an unexpected move, Evan forcefully bit the corner of my lip, drawing a small amount of blood.

"It doesn't matter..." He licked the blood from my lip, his voice laced with determination. "So ravage me mercilessly now, because afterward, I will consume you entirely."

***

He saw hickeys made by Jax but it shouldn't have mattered to him... right?😶