Lost Star~Ateez OT8

Tornado Winds

Tired Embrace

I was back at the Stray Kids hideout. My heart breaking on repeat. My mind kept playing them on a loop when they were kneeling in my hospital room looking so defeated. I’m not going to last long here. I do want to be with Ateez still. But they did hurt me and now I’m not sure if I can trust them. Seungmin helped me to my room, I got checked over by a nurse, took some pain meds and laid in bed. I guess I could try to sleep. I can’t remember where my bag is with my phone otherwise id just go on my phone. Maybe I could get Callie in here to help me find it. Nah, I’ll ask her later

Chan came walking in and sat down on the bed
*Hey Rhea how are you feeling?* - Chan
*Like shit. Chan I miss them. But they hurt me really bad. And I’m not sure what to do about it. What do I do now?*
*Well, you could trying giving them another chance. Talk to them and tell them what you just told me, that they hurt you really bad* - Chan
*Wait sorry. I forgot to tell you, they did come and apologize to me in my room after I got moved from the ICU they looked so defeated and it took everything in me to not give in and forgive them right there. And then when we left the hospital they were still there with flowers, teddy bears and chocolates. It’s breaking me and I feel like such a wreck Chan*
Turning into a blubbering mess, he did his best to try and console me
*Just breathe Rhea, take it one step at a time okay. It’s okay if you want to be with them still and let them earn your forgiveness, and earn your trust back* - Chan
I did my best to nod my head letting him know I heard him and agree with him. I couldn’t turn off the tears, god I’m so emotional right now, I hate feeling weak. He put his arm around me and hugged me, it helped. But honestly I wish it was one of the guys, how I miss them holding me close to them and wearing their clothes
*Just give me a minute Rhea and I’ll go get Callie* - Chan
*Okay. Thanks Chan I appreciate it*
But the second I saw him step out of my room I began to cry even harder, struggling to breathe properly. I need to calm down or I’m going to end up sending myself into a panic attack.
Breathe. Just breathe. I hunched over a little wrapping my self over my midsection and tried to get my breathing under control, tears still falling from my eyes. My vision completely blurry
And then they were there. All eight of them, surrounding me on my bed, Yeosang putting his hand on my back, Hongjoong doing the same thing on the other side of me, Jongho and Seonghwa each took one of my hands, the rest of them moved in closer to me unsure if they should touch me too. Still trying to catch my breath but it’s getting stuck in my throat and it was getting harder for me to breathe. Hyperventilating. Here we go. My body violently shaking, sobs ripping through my chest. Black spots coming across my vision. I can hear Yunho trying to help me by counting to ten. But this one was so much worse. I couldn’t. Darkness pulling me down

Yeosang POV

*Rhea!* But it was too late. She passed out, her body still violently shaking. Both Hongjoong and I caught her in our arms and tried to lay her back down into her bed, I laid down beside her and just held her the best I could, her body still shaking so harshly. Hongjoong laid down on her other side matching everything I was doing. The rest were pacing around the room unsure of what to do. San and Yunho left the room, returning with water, juice and an assortment of snacks for when she wakes up again.
Her body finally calmed down, we didn’t let go. I leaned myself up with my elbow putting my head in my hand so I can look at her. Her cheek bones a little more prominent, she’s so tiny. You can see the exhaustion and sadness in her face even more now that she’s asleep. It’s breaking my heart all over again. We never should have did it. We shouldn’t have thought about it as an option to begin with. We broke our girl. Who knows if she can ever forgive us, she’s different now then when we first met her.
That cold look on her face, and the edge in her tone as she talked to us made me shiver a little. She’s been quiet the whole time she’s been with us, going along with whatever we wanted pretty much. Although we would ask her, she still wouldn’t tell us and she apologized almost every time she spoke. Sweet girl, what have you gone through to be this way? Let me take the pain from you

Rhea POV

I opened my eyes and felt arms on me, looking to the left Hongjoong was laying beside me looking at me with eyes full of worry, I looked over to my right and saw Yeosang laying there his lips quivering a little.
I tried to sit myself up, they helped me right away and then the rest of them were in front of me again. San and Yunho offering me something to drink and laying out the snacks they brought for me. I looked at them and couldn’t help but giggle a little. Their eyes went wide and I can see the happiness on their faces. I looked at each of them before taking a deep breath.
*Okay. I’m willing to give this another shot. But I’m still really hurt by you, and I’m not sure when I’ll be able to trust you again. I’m not the same girl I was before and I’m not going to take any of your shit. So you better start thinking of ways to fix this, because I’m terrified you’re going to hurt me again. And just so you know, if you do, I’m not going to hold Callie back against you*
They all started trying to talk at once. Apologies and saying they would earn my forgiveness and trust. They would never hurt me again. They regret what they did to me. I started to cry again, damn what’s up with me why am I so emotional. That’s when I felt it. I sat up straight as a stick. Trying to push Hongjoong out of my way to go to the bathroom. He could tell what I was trying to do and hesitantly picked me up asking me what I needed. I told him to take me to the bathroom and get me my suitcase
He brought me to the bathroom, Wooyoung behind him with my things. He gently set me down again with a deeply concerned look on his face before him and Wooyoung left the bathroom giving me privacy.
I got my fucking period. This is the cherry on top, stitches down my body, broken heart, why not get my period at the same time. Fucks sake. Cramps beginning and my lower back started hurting.
I quickly took care of that grabbing a pad from my bag. Standing up and hobbling forward I looked in the mirror. My god I’ve lost even more weight. At this point I’m not sure if I even care. I’ll care about it later. I leaned down rummaging through my bag finding my matching blue bra and underwear. And pulling out a pair of sweatpants and a crop top. It felt so much better being out of the hospital clothes. Slowly making my way to the door I opened it and saw Seonghwa and Jongho taking a step toward me, hesitantly both picking me up on either side and packing me back to the bed. They all sat down around me, it seems like they’re waiting for me to say something
*So what’s going to happen now*
*Whatever you want, we’ll do whatever you say. Just let us know* - Yunho
I gave them a slight head nod.
*I need to talk to Callie*
I hadn’t even finished getting her name out before San and Jongho were walking out the door to go get her. She can help me decide what I should do from here