My Random Book Part 2!

Random Stuff

Chapa:"Bose! Er, I mean Matt! Watch out for the shark!"

Ray, who was walking by, overheard what Chapa said and immediately stopped in his tracks.

Ray:"What shark?!(takes a closer look at the game board)what's this?(snatches Alanna's game piece, causing her to let out a "Hey!" and looks at it)This shark doesn't look real!"

Chapa:"That's because this is a GAME, dummy."

Bose:"Jaws the board game!"

Alanna:"A game of horror and suspense!"

Chapa:"Based on the most terrifying motion picture..."

Bose:"...From the terrifying #1 best seller." Bose finished.

Alanna showed Ray the game box then sets it down.

Chapa:"Take a break and play around with us!"

Bose:"Yeah! Come on, sir!"

Alanna:(Holding up the Martin Brody character figure game piece)"Here! You can play Police Chief Martin Brody!"

Ray:"Ah! What the heck! Could be fun!"

Alanna:"Yay!"

Bose:"Yippee!"

Chapa:"Hooray!"

Ray sits down and takes the Brody game piece from Alanna.

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Jaws 

Police Chief Martin Brody

Audience Surrogate: He's not experienced in matters of the sea, not perfect hero material, and basically ordinary.

Me:"Oh like Emmet from The Lego Movie."

The Lego Movie

Emmet:"Look come on! This is just a big misunderstanding! I'm just a regular, normal, ordinary guy!"

Emmet:"I know what you're thinking "He is the least qualified person in the world to lead us!...And you are right."

Me:"Aw man, imagine Emmet in Jaws, accompanying Police Chief Martin Brody, Marine Biologist Matt Hooper, and Shark Hunter Quint to catch the shark. I wonder how he would react when the shark appears? Maybe scream and run around the deck. And I wonder what the others will think of him. Amusing or annoying? Or both? And would they want to use him as bait or ballast? And he would build his double decker couch which the others would want to use as bait or ballast..."

Emmet:"Introducing the double decker couch! So everyone can watch TV together and be buddies!"

Quint:"That is literally the dumbest thing I've ever heard."

Matt:"Please, Quint. Let me handle this. That idea is just the worst."

Quint shakes his head and blinks.

Martin:(To Emmet)"You really haven't got any brains at all, have you son?"

Emmet:"No."

Me:"Yeah, he's obviously not the sharpest tool in the tool box or tool shed. That construction helmet of his is too thick! Ha ha ha! Ha, construction humor."

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Jaws

Matt Hooper:(About the shark)"What we are dealing with here is a perfect engine. An eating machine."

Me:"Oh, like Patrick. Real starfish eat mussels, clams, and snails. Patrick Star eats Krabby Patties, ice cream, popcorn, goo, and even worm food. Patrick will eat anything you give him."