Rovbers

✧𝐗𝐗𝐕𝐈𝐈𝐈 (a bloody threat)

Victoria hugged me. But she wasn't really there. Every hug felt artificial. They were all cold. It felt like hugging lifeless mannequins. Their skin was tough and gray. I couldn't feel warmth from any of them. The pine trees around us were also black. Not even the slightest shade of green present in their glistening wet leaves.

"He is with the Lord..."
Finalized the priest.

Somehow, despite all of my grief, confusion, and sadness. I was able to find a second of warm comfort within that last sentence. Daddy is in a much better place now, I thought. He is resting. He is resting besides Mom in Heaven.

Before leaving, there was just one more thing I had to do. I walked up to the casket. I took a large breath and bent down to kiss Daddy's cheek, one last time. The same cheeks I had kissed everyday up until then, the soft warm skin that had once been so full of movement when he laughed, were then cold and still.

This is it, I thought. You weren't in a nightmare. This is real life. This is actually goodbye. Oh, why can't I just go up to Heaven with him as well?

As we walked to the car I heard some older women gossiping by the drinks table.
"Such a shame, poor little Daniella's an orphan now."

"An orphan? But, what about Victoria?"

"Victoria is her stepmother of course. But her real parents are now both dead."

I could feel Niccolò's hardened hand as he held mine. He wanted to turn around and say heaven knows what to them. But I held the front of his coat tightly.

"Take me home, Niccolò."
I said.

He turned to look at me. Blue eyes bloodshot as raindrops pricked his skin. But I spoke before he had a chance to say anything.
"Please, Nicky, I wanna go home."

The ride home was silent. Never peaceful. I hadn't felt peace in a little while. But it was as tranquil as a rainy day could be. Niccolò hadn't even dared to turn on the radio. All we heard was the rain pouring out into the street through my open window.

"I'm going upstairs for a while, Nicky."
I said softly as we entered the living room.

"Are you sure you're not hungry at all?"
He asked.

"No, thank you. I just don't think I can eat anything right now. I promise, I will. I just need some time."
I smiled weakly.

He smiled too. A reassuring, yet worried,
sort of smile.

I went upstairs and sat on the leather couch in Niccolo's room. I thought I could read for a while. But I couldn't focus.

Oh, Daddy. I love you. How am I supposed to get over you? How can I move on? I thought as the once blue clouds were drawing closer over the balcony in dark heavy shades of grey.

I lay on the living area besides the fireplace which was Niccolò's resting place at nighttime. The leather couch was uncomfortable once you sat in it for a while. Poor Nicky, I thought. I'm glad he didn't sleep here yesterday. The hours went by as slowly as possible. I put my book down and tried to just look over the horizon through the open balcony.

After a dreadful ten minutes of staring at the water fountain in front of me, I thought the tiger statue beside it would come to life and eat me for good. Maybe I should take a nap before these daydreams get the best of me, I thought, settling into the couch.