Need You -N.H- Book Two

Thirty; The End Pt. Two

The End, Pt. Two

We drove back to London in almost utter silence. But it wasn't an awkward awful silence. It was the kind that brings peace to a restless heart and a racing mind. I had missed sitting in that warm silence with him. He holds my hand in his across the center of the car and lays it easy in his lap. Like it fits just right.

Once we get back to the apartment, we part ways because I needed to find a dress for the dinner that night. He leans in carefully and places a kiss on my forehead before going upstairs.

I finally catch my breath as I watch him walk away from me. His back is tense, shoulders back and arms steady at his sides. He was feeling the withdrawal from the alcohol but he was doing his best.

All in all he was doing better than yesterday and the day before. I had fully expected never to see him again. I had prepared my heart for that, it had almost exploded when he stepped through those church doors. I hadn't realized how much I needed his love, his words and his smile around. Now even leaving him to go shopping felt like forever.

That feeling pressured me to shop quickly which wasn't different from any other shopping trip. It didn't take long to search the racks of the dress shop and find something that fit. I could only hope that Niall would enjoy it, the way he did the first time. It was a deep blue color, finally having the color back in my skin I didn't look sick or pale.

I looked normal. It hung into a deep v in the front as the lace of the sleeves climbed over my shoulders and down to my wrists.

A long slit in the front reaches to the diamond blue belt that wraps my waist like a glove. It was perfect. The last time we did this I barely could climb down the stairs. Tonight was a second chance at everything. At what we wanted to be with one another and I couldn't let it slip out of my fingers. When I returned home Niall was no where to be found, just a note in his place.

Needed a haircut, meet you there. -Ni x

I laugh at his incoherent scribbling and walk slowly towards the bedroom. Stripping off the old clothes I step into a warm shower. The water feels good on my sore bones, two weeks of crying would do that to a person. I turn the radio on in my room, moving around it in silence, collecting make-up and the brush. Eventually, after a long time I finally look at myself-really look at myself in the mirror.

My face is still a bit puffy from all the crying but the makeup helped. I swept my hair up and away from my face, I looked presentable. Tonight would be hard, tomorrow even harder. I would have to go there knowing I would have to make the coach's speech without him, and tomorrow.

I didn't even want to think about walking that field alone.

I swallow the dark feeling and turn to the bed where I had laid out the dark blue dress. Picking it up between my fingers I slide into it and zip up the side until it is snug around my chest. I smooth out the bottom and stare at myself for a quick moment to make sure that everything is in fact, in place.

I slip on a pair of black heels and grab one of the small clutches that Liz had dropped off for me to use tonight. I had called a cab before leaving the apartment, locking the door tightly behind me. I take a moment before I climb the stairs, trying to breathe and remind myself that this would be hard but I could do it. There is nothing more that he wants then for me to be happy, so go be happy. I thought. Louis voice ringing through the back of my head like a chime on a windy day.