CHAPTER XVI

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LINGER

I had a sleepless night. I dreamed of Giovanni and me kissing again. It was weird. Why did I dream of him; when he didn’t see me as anything more than his coffee machine? I knew I should leave. That was what he’d told me. I could leave, so why was it when I woke up that morning, I lingered in bed. My phone vibrated. I swiped it on. It was a text from Crispin.

Crispin: Where are you? Class about to start.
Jenny: Sorry, Cris. Sick. Won’t be at school today.
Crispin: What’s your address? I’ll visit you. Want me to take you to the hospital? Is it really bad?
Jenny: I’m all right. Just small headache. Gonna sleep a bit.
Crispin: Your symptoms aren’t coming back, are they?

I thought about that time I was in the hospital after that car crash that killed Ma and put me in critical condition. I stayed in the hospital for a total of six months. I must have crashed my head into something because all my memories from my childhood up until I turned six had been forgotten. Not a lot of people knew about that accident that almost took my life. Only Crispin and my family. No, I didn’t have that headache. I hadn’t since I came to live here.

Jenny: No. I’m fine.
Crispin: Ok. You sleep well, then.
Jenny: I will. Take care.
Crispin: You take care, Jenny. I worry about you. And remember, text if you need anything. I want to help.
Jenny: Thanks, friend.

I dropped onto my pillow and cried. Why was I crying? I should be happy Giovanni was so kind to let me off. I should rejoice in this opportunity. But I felt so lonely. So very lonely. And so lost. I felt I was a little lost child with no home to return to. Pa had run away with Amelia, leaving me behind. Only Crispin was there for me. He was a good friend. He worried about me. But I couldn’t rely on him all the time. It was already good enough that he chose me as his best friend. I had to learn to rely on myself. I forced a smile and pulled open the curtains. The sun shone bright and the sky was cloudless blue. It was a beautiful day outside. I shouldn’t feel so downhearted. So I got up, determined today was going to be a good day. I’d say hello to Giovanni when I saw him. Pretend everything from last night hadn’t happened. Act like our relationship was fine. Yes, everything would be fine. After preparing myself for the day, I went downstairs to make some coffee for Giovanni. But he was nowhere to be found. I searched everywhere for him, but he wasn’t there.

“Guys, have you seen the boss?”

I asked, when I saw the guys in the lounge. They didn’t hear me. Or more likely they didn’t want to hear me. Their eyes were consumed elsewhere. I walked sluggishly to them. They were grouped together in front of the flat-screen, commenting about something. I hadn’t a clue what they were on about. I caught a few words like hot and Ryan Reynolds from The Proposal.

“Hey, what are you guys on about?”

I shoved my way slowly to stand in front of the TV, unlike my usual hyperactive self. The minute my eyes landed on that screen, my heart started skipping again. And I trembled, feeling cold.

“Our boss is hot, right? Look at his eyes. So black, as if they could suck your soul out of heaven.” Bobby had to mention Giovanni’s perfect eyes. I couldn’t take my eyes off his black pupils then. It was like I was entranced by that face, just like last night.

“More like a black hole that sucks your life force out,” I commented quickly, just for something to say so the guys wouldn’t detect my abnormal behavior. Yeah. He did suck out my life force. I have no energy today. Bobby looked horrified at my answer, though.

“But check out that body. Boss has such perfect genes. You can’t find a body that hot.”

“He works out at 3:00 a.m. every morning, Bobby. Trust me. I’m the one who makes his coffee.”

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