Remus <3

17 Poppy

He woke up and before looking around him, at the injury that placed him there, or even the potions he needed for the pounding headache he had, he looked at Ash and smiled.

"Morning," Ash greeted.

"Good morning."

He looked down at his bandaged chest now. He grimaced at the pain he felt when he tried to lift himself into a sitting position. Ash watched as he struggled, almost smiling to herself as he tried so hard to move a pillow.

When he finally managed to sit up he leaned hi head back and looked at the ceiling.

"You know... I used to really hate the moon. I'd curse it everytime I saw it."

Ash nodded.

"I hated how much control it had over me. Hated that I had to keep up with it's phases and cycles. Hated what it made me into. And then it changed. I hated Greyback. I hated what he made me. I hated what he did to me. I hated that wizards who could ruin someones life without a second thought existed. And now..."

Ash knew what was coming. She had been too close with Remus for too long. She could feel the weight of his words before he said them. And now... he hated himself.

Remus didn't say it, he knew how much Ash hated hearing it. After years of protest and earnest convincing on Ash's part that he wasn't a monster, Remus believed. But he only believed that Ash didn't see him as a monster. Just because she didn't see him as one, didn't mean he wasn't one.

"If I became a werewolf-"

"You would never-"

"If I became a werewolf, what would you say to me?"

"I would say... that you could get through it. That nothing has to change. That I'll help you get through it."

"Would you think I didn't deserve the friends I had. Would you think my friends should ditch me because I might put them in danger?"

"No of course not-"

"And if you weren't a werewolf and I was, would you be there for me?"

"I..." Remus faltered, "I would."

"Real confident about that one Lupin," Ash laughed.

"Sorry I just, never considered that."

"I have. I've thought about all the alternate universes where I was the 'monster' and you were the wizard that knew. In every single scenario you were the kind boy you are now. Sometimes you were terrified, sometimes you couldn't look me in the eye, sometimes you resented me for taking away your studying time, but every single time you would do everything in your power to help me. And that's why I don't care what I have to sacrifice or give to be your friend because you would give so much more if the roles were reversed, because you aren't a monster."

"You've thought about it more than me."

"We know that isn't true. I do wonder though, what if you used a time turner, travel in time until right after the full moon, that way you skip it all together."

"Huh, that could work. Only thing is time turner's are expensive and messing with nature never turns out well."

"I hate when you're practical," Ash rolls her eyes.

"You should get to class," Remus smiles.

"It's potions and my partner is currently hanging onto live by a thread," Ash shrugs.

So they sat there and talked until potion passed. Then they laid down and talked until charms had passed.

"You know last night Poppy said the funniest thing."

"What did she say," Remus inquired.

"Hinted that we would get together as more thna friends."

Remus thought about dating Ash for a second before a single thought flashed in his mind, "ridiculous."

"That's exactly what I thought. If I were to date any of the marauders it would be Sirius," Ash laughed off the thought of dating Remus.

Remus cringed at the thought of Ash and Sirius. He didn't mind the thought of being with Ash, but it didn't make sense. She was his best friend and his other best friends sister. It just wasn't plausible, the thought of Sirius and Ash for some reason was plausible and Remus hated it. He didn't know why but the thought of them together made his blood boil.

"Oh yeah? Is it cause of his dreamy hair or the grey eyes you could just get lost in?" Remus joked, ignoring the sharp pang in his chest that didn't come from the wound.

"Oh please, it's never going to happen, I'm just saying it makes the most sense. Considerinng James is my brother, Peter is simply too quiet, and you're... you?"

"Gee thanks."

Remus's thought drifted back to his lycanthropy. The reason he didn't date. The reason he would never let himself date. Lyanthropy didn't even flash into Ash's mind. She thought Remus was offended because she implied he wasn't attractive enough, which wasn't the case either.

"You know that's not what I meant," Ash laughed.

"And what did you mean?"

"I think she meant for you to stop flirting with her and take 3 steps back," James walks in with Sirius and Peter in tow.

"Hard to do if I'm the one in the hospital bed," Remus counters.

"Right you are," James agrees as he drags Ash's chair back.

"I am so glad my brother isn't the protective type," she sighs.

"Aw come on Prongs you don't have to worry about her and Moony. We all know she's saving herself for me," Sirius winks.

"How does he do it? Hit the nail on the head once again," Ash smiles at her friends.