Rock Bottom

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I slowly sink, sliding down the wall until I'm hugging my knees close to my chest and bury my head in my hands. Just letting the tears fall and consume me, finally letting go of all the pain I've been hiding from everyone. My body trembled and shook as i let out everything I've been feeling. I shouldn't miss my next class because dad would find out and he would beat me for it, but i just can't get myself to care anymore. Why do i keep fighting to live if this is the life I'm fighting so hard to stay apart of. I was beaten, raped and tormented! This was it, I don't wanna fight for this anymore.

After a few deep breaths, I let my tears dry and i thought out my plan of how I want to do it. There were so many ways, all of them swimming around in my mind. But, I had to make sure whatever way I chose it wouldn't go wrong. Jumping wasn't guaranteed, so that's out. I could throw myself in front of a car, but even that could only result in a few broken bones and I'd still live. I thought hard and paced for what felt like hours, until it hit me. My dad has a 9mm pistol in his office drawer. Only reason i knew it was even there was because he had threatened me with it before, and as far as I saw he doesn't bother locking it up, thinking I wouldn't ever go in there.

I was desperate and I would be dead anyway so why does it matter if I went into his office? I could even do it right there, so he would have to clean up and explain the mess he led me to do. I was never a spiteful person but something about killing myself in his chair and having him find me, dealing with the fallout of my death, made me smile. I only wish i could see his face when he finds me and how he planned to explain it away. I had to put my plan into action now though, while he wasn't home to be sure I couldn't be stopped. With one last breath to boost my resolve, I walked out from my hiding place and began to walk towards the front of the school, where my bike it parked.

My mind is focused on one thing and one thing only, so I didn't care who saw my leaving school early. I mounted my bike, not even feeling bad that i knocked a bunch over.

"Hey Sunny, where's the fire?" Jayden's voice rang out from the front entrance of the school's steps.

I ignored him and turned my bike around and jumped on in one swift motion. There were footsteps coming up behind me, so i took off as fast as I could. My focus zeroed in with a new found determination and I pumped my legs as fast as i could, not even bothering to wait for cars to pass. So what if they hit me, I'd just jump back on my bike and continue my way home until this was done.

"Sunny!! Hey, slow down girl!" I heard one of the boys yell to me, but I don't turn or slow down. I'm just focusing on getting home and up to my dad's office.

I heard a string of curses and the sound of screeching tires as i weave in and out of traffic without looking or stopping. When i finally make it home, I don't even slow down before jumping off my bike and sprinting to the door.

"Dammit Sunny, slow down will you!" Someone yelled as i fumbled with my house keys.

Several footsteps could be heard behind me and someone pulled my arm to make me turn towards them. My chest rose and fell heavily as i try to calm my racing heart.

"What the hell was that? You could have gotten your self killed! What the hell id wrong with you?" Asher said gripping my arm tighter.

"Let me go!" I growled at him, ripping my arm from his grasp.

With one more try, i got my key in and burst through the front door and ran straight to my father's office. I opened several drawers and slamming them shut in frustration when I couldn't find what I'm looking for.

"Where is it?" I ask in desperately under my breath. Finally, i found it in the last drawer on the left side of his desk. I stood there staring at it for a few moments before i reach in and wrapping my hands around the cool metal. My heart was pounding, i could feel it in my ears as I felt the weight of the pistol in my hands. I slowly pull it all the way out of the desk drawer, keeping my eyes locked on it.

"Sunny...Sawyer... what are you doing?" Kason asks. I finally lift my gaze to see his wide eyes staring at me, and then back to the gun in my hands. Slowly i lift the gun and pointed it at the guys I've grown to hate over the last three years.

"Get out!" I screamed at them, holding the gun and pointing it at Asher. I wouldn't shoot any of them, because I wasn't no murderer. I didn't want to hurt anyone but myself.

"Easy Sunny, Okay... we can talk about this..." Kason says softly, stepping closer to me.

"My name isn't Sunny!" I screamed at him.

"Sorry. Sawyer, just calm down okay?" He said keeping his hands raised and slowly moving closer.

"Get away Kason or I swear I will shoot you. Get the hell out all of you! You've all done enough! You all have! Just leave me alone for once!" I screamed tightening my eyes.

I quickly move the pistol towards myself. If they wont leave then they can be witnesses. A shot rings out and I gasped just as darkness fell around me. I welcomed the peace, the darkness brought.

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