ninety-seven

395 5 11
                                    

Kiara

,,I. Hate. Every. One. Of. You." I says when I get down. Or better said, when JJ pushes me down.
,,Especially you." I shoots a special death stare to JJ.
,,I love you too." he says and we make it out of the cabin.

He grabs my hand and our bracelets joins together. We start to walk to the main road and head to one of the trail around here.
,,This is nice. Fresh air. The beauty of our nature." Sarah looks around her and stops at me.
,,Grumpy Kiara! What else do you want, right?" she shouts and keeps going.
,,Sleep! I would very much like a sleep!" I shout after her. She doesn't actknowladge me.
,,She had to heard me, right?" I look at JJ.
,,She's ignoring you." he smiles.
,,Bitch." I say to myself.
,,Rude!" she shouts.
,,Oh, you heard that!" I shake my head.
,,Do you feel better?" JJ asks me.
,,No, but give me a minute with her alone and I will." I state.
,,I wasn't asking about cursing at Sarah." he says. I look at him.
,,I was asking about your well being." he explains.
,,I'm fine, JJ." I look away. He stops and makes me stop too. I sigh.
,,I feel better. Not great. I still have a lot of guilt and... hurt from Rafe, but I'm working on it. I promise." I look into his eyes so he would know it's the truth.
,,From all the promises you made me, don't break this one." he says.
,,I know you don't want to talk about what happened with Rafe. At least not all of it, but if you'll ever change your mind, I'm here to listen. We all are here for you. Even if we get into fight again, this is the most important thing for me. For you to be okey. Not peachy. Not fucking great. Okey." he finds my eyes.
,,You already did the most important thing for me, J. I already told you that." I step closer to him.
,,No matter how angry you were, I wasn't scared of you. Not for a single second. Because I knew deep down, that no matter what are you going to do, it never crossed my mind that you would hit me. I also know it never crossed your mind either. You just walked away and that was everything you could have do for me." I smile at him.
,,I would never hit you." he nods.
,,I know, but... don't you ever try to get rid of my hair-straightener. It's expesive, dude." I joke.
,,Sorry, I didn't really think Sarah would throw it out of the window." he bites his lip.
,,I'll buy you a new one." he states.
,,That's also another thing. You are not trying to change me. You don't care what I wear or how my hair looks like. Who I talk to. I didn't have that with... him." I look down.
,,What do you mean?" he asks me.
,,I had to straighten my hair and wear clothes he approved. I couldn't talk to other boys. I couldn't talk to you guys. I had to tell him everywhere I went. I had to call him every other minute when I wasn't with him." I look away.
,,Kie.." he sighs.
,,I'm so fucking sorry." he steps forward and hugs me.
,,I hope you know I don't want any of this. I want you to do whatever you want. Safely." he says.
,,I know, I wouldn't be with you if you didn't, but.. sometimes I can't help it. Wondering. If I shout do that or that. If I should change my clothes. Like last night. I was afraid what are you going to say to my clothes, because it was very... very." I lean back so I could look into his eyes.
,,But the second I saw your face, I know you wouldn't say anything even if you could have since we weren't together in their eyes." I say.
,,I saw it in you face, that you didn't think about telling me to change, you just accepted I'm wearing this and that's it. I also know you love my curly hair more and I am straightening them to annoy you, but you didn't made me to wash them so they would be curly again. You were annoyed and still smiled. You pretend to like it every freaking time. That's partly why I do it. Too feel like I can and you will smile anyway. Because you really love me, not the idea of me. I could shave my head and wear garbage bag. You would still say I look nice and love me the same." I smile at him.
,,Yes I would." he kisses me forehead.
,,But I am begging you, don't shave your head. I'll do anything." he chuckles.
,,Anything, huh?" I look up.
,,You are not going back to bed." he shakes his head.
,,Fine." I sigh.
,,I'm glad you know all this." he steps back.
,,I told you." I smile.
,,You are nothing like him. He can try change all he wants but the past is still there. He can't run from it. I can't run from it." I bite my lip.
,,That's why I still have a lot of guilt about what I put you through." I say.
,,We'll work on that." he smiles.
,,Because you did it for good reason. At least.. the effort was there." he shakes his head.
,,And for that reason, you can make it right. He can't." he states.

,,You know we lost them." I look around us.
,,I don't care." he shakes his head.
,,We'll find each other. We always do and untill then, you are still here." he starts to walk again.
,,You'll do for the time being." he jokes.
,,You really want to sleep on the couch I see." I comment.
,,You bet." he turns to me.
,,I heard it's comfy." he says.
,,I heard that too." I quicken my pace so I could grab his hand again.
,,It's nice around here." JJ looks around us.
,,It is." I don't look away from him.
,,You are with me totally only for my looks." he laughs.
,,Why else would I be with you?" I ask.
,,For my splended personality." he smiles.
,,Didn't see it yet." I shake my head.
,,I might suprise you." he says back.
,,I like a good suprise." I smile.
,,I didn't say it's going to be a good suprise, just that you'll be suprised." he states.
,,Oh sorry I misunderstood." I nod.
,,But since it's you, I'll take it even if it's a bad suprise." I add.
,,You don't have much of a choice since you are stuck with me." he looks at me.
,,Because.." he waits for me to finish the sentence.
,,Because we are never going to be done." I repeat his words.
,,But mark my words, we are not jumping out of an airplane. Ever." I state.
,,We'll see." he nods.
,,We totally are, right?" I ask.
,,I didn't think about it, but since you suggested it. We are doing it. I have to make every your wish come true." he laughs at my face.
,,I hate you." I state.
,,I know." he smiles.
,,And I love it." he adds.

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