03: The Feeling of Betrayal

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Because he ate everything and left nothing to the man, not even a piece of skin or a bone, he was kicked out of the tower and was banned from entering until the following year. Even if the masked man wanted to ban the boy for longer, he couldn't since he still needed him for missions.

The boy had wanted to ask about the book he had discovered, but it looked like it was no longer an option. Well, it didn't matter; the man most likely didn't know much either, and he had lost interest in asking him anyway.

If the masked man knew that his rash action had made him miss such a golden opportunity, he would have cried and kneeled while begging for forgiveness.

Being banned from the tower wasn't serious to the boy; he hadn't needed to go there as he was occupied with analysing the book. Every day, at the end of the day—sometimes after school—the girl would write a new entry about her day and her feelings about it. At first, it looked clumsy, but the more she wrote, the more she became comfortable with it.

Through her, he had concluded that she didn't live in the same place; rather, he suspected that there was another world besides the one he resided in. A part of her usage of words didn't exist or belong to his world. The concept of another world existing was absurd, but it was the most logical explanation he could think up.

Another crucial discovery he had made was that he couldn't communicate with the person on the other side—it wasn't a two-way transmission. He had attempted multiple tries by writing something on the pages but to no avail. No matter what he wrote, she didn't respond to him or show any sign of awareness.

His eyes fell to the current page, and he watched the girl write her entry.

[... Ananas, it happened again today. The kids in my school are so mean, I'm telling you. What friends? Just a bunch of stupid liars pretending to be friends. They talked behind my back again. Also, we had an activity together and had to divide into two groups. The teacher picked the leaders, and each leader had to choose their teammates. And guess what? I was picked last, as always. I was never someone's first choice. I heard them say that I was too boring and weak. Why? What did I do wrong? I haven't done anything, but maybe that's why. It's fine. I don't need them.]

The girl, Eislyn, was only a child who didn't suffer from poverty and lived a good life but was still lonely. He couldn't relate to her, he had never felt lonely, nor did he think friends were important. However, this girl longed for a friend who could understand her and have her back no matter what. A friend that would do and experience as many things as possible with her and make her happy.

Such an unrealistic thing didn't exist; he had wanted to tell her that. People would always end up stabbing each other in one way or another. That was just their nature.

It was silly, the girl was silly, and he was silly for even reading this.

[Does anyone actually care about me and like me? I always find myself wondering about it. I may have people to hang out with at school and parents who work hard to live comfortably, but at the end of the day, they're people I can't confide in at all because we aren't close enough. Maybe I've watched too much TV, seen too many shows, but I can't help it. I just observe the people around me and notice things that would be better left unknown. I just don't know what to do.]

The boy ignored the word 'TV' as the term had been used before, and he still didn't know what it exactly meant. He knew that her expectations of an ideal friend came from the shows she frequently watched on TV.

[I wish you were real, Ananas. I think my life would've been much better. I wouldn't need to feel so empty. I don't feel like I belong here. I really need some pineapple now.]

She ended it by adding her usual ugly drawings related to the content. He often wondered how much free time she had to spend all on an idiotic thing called a diary and the irrelevant people around her.

Despite thinking it was lame, the boy still looked forward to the next entry. He didn't have to sit still and wait with anticipation, thanks to being assigned missions. The next day's entry came, and he immediately abandoned his task to read it.

[...and it was so amazing. Heroes and their companions are always so much fun! I can't wait for the next episode to come out next week! How can people wait every week for a new episode? It's such a long wait :'(

Also, Mum and Dad are working late again. They left in a hurry this morning and forgot to lock the door. So forgettable. They're lucky they have a smart daughter.

They always do that anyway. I'm used to it. They will get home late as usual.

There's nothing more to watch. I also ate all my snacks. I don't feel like playing games right now.

I'm bored. Should I go to a friend's house and ask if they want to hang out? Never mind, I don't know where they live.

I'll just stare at my spotless white ceiling.

... I want the day to be over already. Mum promised to cut some pineapple for me to eat before school.

I'm already drooling.

My pineapple, hehe, I'm coming for you.]

He closed the book harder than usual. Throughout the reading, he ignored his surroundings, and by the time he looked up, his targets had their weapons pointed at him. None of them had made a move yet like an invisible force was restricting them.

"Good boys. My hands suddenly feel itchy to move, so let's pick up where we left off."

He snapped his fingers, and all of them immediately rushed at him.

In no time, he finished his mission for the day.

This was just the beginning; checking the book and reading the diary entries had become a routine in his life, and it proceeded like so for three years straight, even though it was just a girl's diary and there wasn't any useful secret.

He had accepted the certitude of being her ideal friend Ananas because the only one reading the diary, besides the girl herself, was him.

The girl tended to go straight to the point and didn't beat around the bush, so each entry wasn't too long. She would write down all her dislikes and likes and mention that she kept being misunderstood because her explanations weren't clear enough, even though she thought otherwise. This was one way of many that led her to flip people off as she liked.

Throughout the years, he had learnt much about the girl enough to proclaim that no one knew her more than him confidently. She never held back and poured out everything about her life and feelings. Another thing she never shied away from was gossip; thanks to that, he knew a lot of unnecessary information about people who didn't know about his existence.

He carried the book with him everywhere to make sure not to miss a single day and didn't let anyone touch it. As he had treated it like it was precious to him, people with ulterior motives attempted to steal the book from him. Those who did, though, all tragically met a bad ending.

A new day came, and he was ready to read the latest entry like usual; he waited the whole day, but not a single letter appeared. The page was still blank and untouched.

It was just a day, he had thought. It didn't mean anything.

However, the next day went by, and there was still nothing. The result was the same the day after that and remained so from then on.

Nevertheless, he continued to open the book every day, without missing a day, to see if she had returned.

But she never did.

He waited and waited, but for how long should he wait? She didn't mention anything about quitting nor bid him goodbye.

Unwittingly, a sense of betrayal was building up inside him.

Before he knew it, he had long ago had his feelings swayed by the girl who had become someone significant enough for him to be attached to.

Despite the betrayal he felt, he never stopped checking the book regularly because deep down, he couldn't help but hope that one day she would come back to him.


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