Losing you ; Joel Miller

xxxii. Just listen

[2023]
EDEN

Darkness fell on the small commune in Jackson Wyoming, Ada had been successfully tucked in and Eden stood in the kitchen opening a bottle of whiskey. Callum was supposed to come over and watch a movie she had found on one of her latest supply runs. " Free Willy..." Eden mumbled out the title while inspecting the old VHS tape.

Knocks on her door made her put down the small cassette tape, eyebrows furrowing, Callum doesn't usually knock. She shrugged it off and went to go greet her friend.

As the old wooden door creaked open, Eden felt herself freeze. Joel was standing in front of her, deep brown eyes examining her features. Her body acted on instinct, pulling him close into a tight hug as hot tears fell down her cheeks. " I thought you were dead- I- you asshole! You left me!" Her emotions were overwhelming; sadness, anger, relief, betrayal, she pounded her hand against his chest.

     " I know baby, I'm sorry, you have all right to be angry" Joel's voice was soothing, his calloused hands rubbing her back. The anger she felt had been dangerously brewing for such a long time, it was bound to boil over.

     Eden pushed him away " fuck you! Fucking asshole! You- you left me!" Shoving him with each frustrated yell, Eden sobbed as she continued to scream. " I'm so sorry baby, but I can't take back my actions, can we talk? Please?" The blonde stared at him with disbelief, nose and cheeks red and flushed. " I don't want to talk to you" she said with a whisper.

     Her words cut Joel like a knife, eyes filling with hurt as he stepped closer " I know you're angry, sweet thing, please just listen to me, I-" she cut him off with another push " no! I thought you were dead Joel! You promised me that you'd stay by my side, and you broke that promise!" His shoulder's slumped, pulled together as he crossed his arms, regretful eyes darting across the floor as he chewed on his cheek. Nodding solemnly, Joel turned around and started slowly walking away.

Eden's heart hammered in her chest, a sudden pang of panic coursing through her as she watched him. " Wait..." her voice broke, attempting to get rid of her tears with the back of her hand " I'm sorry" she whispered out, worrying her quivering bottom lip.

" You have nothin' to apologise for" Joel said as he turned to look at her " you didn't do nothin' wrong" she shifted her weight between her feet, hating how much she missed him. " I didn't mean what I said... I do want to talk, I've missed you-" Eden choked out a sob when Joel quickly walked towards her, pulling her into his large frame, arms wrapping her into a tight hug.

" We arrived at the university only to find it empty. The fireflies had moved to a facility in Salt Lake City... we ended up getting attacked by raiders and I got hurt" They were sitting on the sofa, Eden sat facing him with her knees tightly pressed against her chest, a soft blanket wrapped around her. Joel moved up his shirt, showing Eden the ugly scar on his stomach. She gasped softly, asking him what happened.

" Fell down from the second floor and landed right on a metal rod stickin' out of some debris... Ellie got me out of there but I- I had lost so much blood I collapsed off of the horse and she had to drag me all the way into an abandoned home" Joel sighed, seeming upset with himself that Ellie was put into that situation. " I was dying, the wound that gotten infected and we were running out of food. I told Ellie to leave me, that she should take the horse and go back to Jackson."

     " When she walked up the stairs, I thought it was going to be the last time I'd see her... and then I thought about you and Ada. I regretted not tellin' you I loved you more, and I hated myself for leaving you..." Eden sniffled, worrying her bottom lip as she listened. Her eyes were red and puffy, lashes wet from tears. " Ellie ended up comin' back with a sewing needle and thread... I'm not surprised, she never listens to me" a small chuckle left Joel, face hardening soon after. " She has been through hell these last five months, I'm glad we're safe and back in Jackson"

     " Did you guys ever find the fireflies?" Eden asked softly, head tilting slightly " yeah... but uh- we found out that they've given up on making a cure."

     " Oh..."

     Joel shuffled in place, reaching for his back pocket " I have somethin' for you..." Eden's eyes filled with curiosity when he handed her a small black box. " What is this?" She asked softly as Joel coaxed for her to open it.

The sight of two rings placed neatly in the box made Eden gasp, one smaller and slightly weathered from it's age, but beautiful nonetheless. " Is this sapphire?" She whispered out, shaky fingers picking up the piece of jewellery as though it was the most precious thing in the world. Joel nodded, rasping out " one for me and one for you... I found them on the way to Salt Lake City."

Eden opened her mouth, about to say something when the front door swung open and someone yelled out " hey E! You ready for movie nigh-" Callum froze when he saw who was sitting on the sofa, eyes widening as he sputtered out " oh- shoot- uh- just pretend I never walked in here-" before quickly leaving the scene.

" What is he doing here?" Joel's face portrayed a mix of emotions, from confusion to betrayal. Eden internally cursed out Callum for sprinting back out the door and leaving her alone to handle the situation. " Callum and I-" Eden was interrupted by Joel abruptly standing up, demeanour turning cold and distant as he crossed his arms.

" No, I get it. I've been gone for a while, I'm not even surprised" Eden stood up too, hand reaching out for him as she tried to explain to deaf ears. They were just friends, he's been helping her with Ada- " don't wanna intrude on your movie night. I'll leave" Joel flinched away from her touch, face stern when he gave her one last glance before moving towards the exit.

" Joel! Fuck- why don't you just listen?" Eden cried with frustration, helplessly following after him. " I don't need to, I already know what's going on" halting his pace, he turned to stare at her blankly " I won't bother you anymore. Have a good night, Eden."

Honey is typing...
They both need to work on their listening skills lmfao💀