- I can't be -

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by ellsicles

by ellsicles

TRIGGER WARNING: this piece of text mentions topics including isolation, loss of identity, self-loathing, existentialism, and more within this realm. If you think that any of the topics mentioned could potentially cause a unwanted response or trigger you, I advise you to skip this text. If you are in a place where you feel as though there isn't an exit, please seek the help and support of a loved one or a licensed mental health professional. You are not alone, and we all believe in you <3<3<3

- Lots of Love, Theo

- I can't be -

One way mirror of the person society wanted me to be.
Locked behind the bars.
Banging against the frame yelling out, screaming.
Born into a world, a generation, a society that I didn't get to choose.
Born into a place where hurt was already destined for me.
Born into a place where we are picked apart so that nothing but the exterior shell is left.
how am i supposed to be myself when i haven't a clue in the world of who that is.
how am i supposed to love me when just me is hurting thee.

I can't be angry, for that I am problematic.

I can't be sad, for that I'm a sensitive snowflake.

I can't be happy, for that I am ungrateful.

I can't be confused, for that I am stupid.

I can't be tired, for that I am lazy.

I can't be loving, for that I cause discomfort.

I can't be in love, for that I am desperate.

I can't take care of myself, for that I am selfish.

I can't open up, for that I am self-absorbed.

I can't be skilled, for that I am arrogant.

I can't be seen, for that I am an attention-seeker.

I can't be heard, for that I am too loud.

I can't be held, for that I am a baby.

I can't be good enough, for that I am not good enough for you.

I can't be them, for that I am trying too hard.

I can't be you, for that I am a plagiarist.

I can't be me, for that I am just deviant.

I can't be anything because for that I will always be something people find adversarial.

I can't just be, for that I am not allowed.

For that I can't be.
For that I can never be.

Thank you so much for taking the time to read and for listening :) It truly means a lot to me :)

I would love to hear your thoughts, feelings and feedback