Recipe for Love

Page 9

"Simon." He moaned out my name as he coated our stomachs. I gave in, kissing him I emptied into him, hopefully the condom held. No reason to have both of us pregnant. A double pregnancy that way was just reaching to far. I pulled out and flopped to the side. It was always a trial on me to go that slow but I liked the results better. He rolled over curled onto my chest. He combed a hand through my hair.

"Slow is definitely going to be my new favorite." He said. I chuckled.

"Seeing my lover completely rang out is a big favorite of mine."

"You accomplished your goal. I feel empty. If I could get drained and filled at the same time we would have perfection I think." I laughed.

"Pregnancy test first that second." I cleared my throat. "The scar on your stomach, where did that come from?"

"I was young and trying to invent something. I blew up the science lab and some of the shrapnel cut me straight across nearly disemboweled me. One of the older kids, brave guy, came in and saved me. The doctors swore that if he hadn't done it I'd have died." I sat up and stared down at him. It wasn't possible. Was it? Where did I put those year books? It couldn't be but part of me said it was.

"Mike..." I wanted to ask but did he know? Did he want me to know? I slid from bed pulled off the condom and went to my closet.

"Simon, what are you doing?"

"Looking for something. I have to find it I know it's in here." I slipped another box out. Yep here they were. That would have been fifth grade. I pulled it out and flipped it open. I searched, they'd taken a picture at the hospital of me and the kid I saved. Was it? I stared at the picture. Then read the caption.

"Doctors say that third grader, Michael Rollins, is alive today because of the brave heroics of fifth grader, Simon Jones. The young man pictured here with the boy he saved just shrugged when asked why he did it and said 'No one else was going to do it.' I looked at Mike who sat in my bed. He was looking away.

"I was sort of hoping it'd take you longer than ten seconds to put that together."

"You knew who I was the day we met didn't you?" He sighed.

"No. But it didn't take me long to figure it out. As a little kid you were my superman. You saved my life, literally. Then my parents moved us because the school was being a bunch of idiots. But I never forgot you. The older I got no matter who I dated, I kept having this mental picture of you. One brave act. I would always ask myself 'They are great but would they run into a burning room to save me if no one else would do it.' Only once did I think I had someone I could say yes to that. Then they cheated on me. Save me yes, not hurt me to begin with? That was something else. When we met I knew you looked familiar for some reason. About argument three or four I realized who you were. I kept poking at you trying to show myself you weren't that superman figure I had always held up as the measure for everyone else. But no matter how much we argued how many times I picked at you, you never showed me anything that said you'd become some raging jackass unworthy of my feelings. It's damn frustrating. Sure you've got things that you could work on but you are still the same superman guy who saved me. I never really thought I'd be able to have you as mine. Then I decided that if I could tick you off surely I could make up for it and maybe be your friend." He finally glanced at me. "Little did I know that I'd find a man to truly love. I know it's quick but you've got to understand I started falling the day you came to visit me for that picture. You brought me that silly stuffed teddy bear, which I know your mother picked out."

"Shit, that damn bear in your office on the filing cabinet." He was blushing now. He shrugged.

"It went everywhere, even to college with me. I got some major shit for it but I couldn't forget you." He slid from the bed and pulled on his briefs, then his pants. "I think I should go. Let you think. This is a lot to know. I know you'll want to think about it and see if it changes how you feel for me. I know you've got my address and phone if you want to talk." I didn't say anything as he slipped his shoes on and with his shirt in hand left.

Well he was right I'd want to know if this changed how I felt. The answer to that was pretty easy. It made me realize why I didn't hold a grudge. It wasn't Mike who looked like Alex. It was Alex who looked like Mike. I jumped up and grabbed my robe. He was halfway down the hall. I ran to catch him jerking him around. He was very surprised to see me so quickly.

"Yes. It changes things. Makes me understand a guy I'm falling pretty quick for. Makes me understand why. It's not getting to know you from scratch it's realizing that I already knew you and I got to know you, now as an adult." I pulled him in and kissed him. He came quickly and stayed in my arms kissing me with passion.

"I want you Simon, I want to be yours forever. I know you aren't sure about your own feelings and that's okay but I need you to know that I'm here and unless you tell me flat out that you don't want me and don't want to be with me, I'm gonna stay right here."

"Sounds good to me." I slip my arms under him making him laugh as I carry him back to my room. I can't be slow and thorough this time. I lay him back and quickly shove inside of him. He moans. I wasn't sure but I was leaning more toward keeping him than ever being able to let him go. I pounded into him his body wrapped tight around me. He moaned as he got close. His channel tightened on me and I let go as he came.

"I love you." He moaned into my ear. I kissed him deep. I couldn't say it back yet but I really thought that I would someday.