Hey , Brown girl

unclear feelings ⛅️

Me: why? Why do you care about me so much ?

He stopped on his place , but he didn't turn around , he was just standing there like a statue , he didn't reply me so I continued.

Me: you made clear that I can never be your friend and you didn't like me . So why are you showing so much affection towards me all of sudden? Why are you doing this ?

Suga: yes your right cause you can never be my friend, and the things your are talking about is not affection aditi. Stop making things up.

Me : then what was this all? Ha?

Suga: it was just a heat of the movement

Me : what do you mean by heat of movement?

He was still backfacing me . He sighed and slightly tilted his head towards right but not exactly looking at me . My heart was beating fast , I can't breathe properly because of nervousness.

Suga: it means I lead you on.

With that he walked out of my room .. is this guy lost his mind ???!!!! O.m.g what does he mean that he lead me on.???! This all shit doesn't even made sence to me ??! I am sure the things he did has a reason or purpose behind it . I'm 100 percent sure that he was not leading me on he is just making things up . But why is he doing this?

Suga's pov:

I closed my rooms door and grabbed my hairs in frustration and groned ahhhh !!!Why did I said those things to her??!!

It was like she suddenly asked me the reason and I was not ready to tell her that yet. So I made things up that doesn't even made sence in any angle . Shit !! Shit man I fucked up really bad !!!

But what do I even do ??! She asked me the question which answer was unknown to me too! Yaa i felt jealous when someone goes near her or showe her any kind of affection. I hate it when she talks to Rohit, I hate the way he look at her ... I hate it , I just want her to myself. I want to feel her warmth against me , feel her kiss .. what am I thinking??
I shook my head to blow away all the throughts, I layed on the bed and closed my eyes trying to sleep.

Aditi: you made clear that i can not be your friend.

Her voice echoed in my head . I opened my eyes and sighed, why did I even say that to her? That day I lost my mind cause I was afraid.
Yess I was afraid , afraid of falling in love again . And I was falling for her each passing day. I still remember when I first saw her , I chuckle left my lips remembering the event .

Flash back

I was riding my motorcycle going back home from school , as usual headphones plugged in my ears , annoyed at the fact that I have to go to school daily . But all my throughts were vanished when I saw a brown girl crossing the road , I stopped my motorcycle to take a proper look at her ,she was not korean for sure. She crossed the road and walked inside a dark ally . She should not go anywhere like this alone in foreign country. So I decided to follow her until she is safe . I praked my bike and followed her maintaining proper distance between us ,

She walked while humming a song , her voice is so sweet , then suddenly she walked towards the corner and bend down on her knees . What is she doing? I walked close and saw her petting a cat .
A chuckle left my lips . She was so gental, I was standing there looking at her , her silky black hairs falling on her face time to time , the way she was brushing them away gently with her fingertips , she was so attractive I can't take my eyes off her . She was nothing like korean girls . She was brown, with curvy figure which is rare in Korean girls , with long black hairs which reached her waist . She was like a angel . I am usually not attracted towards girls so easily but she was not the case .
My throughts were interrupted when water droplets fell on my face , shit it was raining.. I quickly wore my mask and cap and ran towards a shed near by , I was dusting water from my shirt when I felt her beside me , I looked towards her . She was not that soked , carrying that little kitten in her arms , she bend down and let that little thing free , that kitten walked away and she was looking at her with a cute chubby smile on her face . I dought that she can speak korean, she looks of my age . I was still watching her and I guess she was not aware of it ,and I'm so much glad about it !

She pulled out a small umbrella from her bag and was about to open it , but suddenly she looked at me and I looked away on time. I can feel her eyes on me .
Then I herd her voice for the first time .

??: excuse me.

I turned my head towards her , slightly shocked at her perfection in korean language, I looked at her and she smile forwarding her umbrella towards me

??: you can have it .

I shook my head as no .

??: it's okay I live near by so you can have it I don't mind .

She insisted a lot so I accepted her offer , she looked reveled and she ran off from there using her bag as the shield on her head protecting her from rain .

End of flashback

I still remember how much I was happy when I got to know that she goes to same school as me but a year younger . I saw how much my friends were showing intreast in her and that thing was pissing me off ! My intreast in aditi was growing day by day and that was scaring the shit out of me , cause I don't trust girls , they are fake ... all girls are fake . I have lots of experience from my past relationships and from that day I decided that I will never fall in love . And she was breaking my oath . That's why I was always rude to her and pushing her away from me just to protect my heart from breaking. But now I can't do this anymore, and I seriously don't know why. I am not clear about my feelings yet . This can be attraction or a slight crush , I want to clarify my feelings first before taking further step . I know I'm sounding like a dumbass but I don't want to hurt her in future because of my unclear feelings.

I closed my eyes again and after few seconds I drifted to sleep.