Intrepid » n.h. au

Chapter 45

"Hey, isn't Freya's birthday today? I remembered because it's on weed day."

I sigh at Seth's — annoying — words, and lift my head from the pillow so only my eyes are visible. "Yeah," I mumble into the cotton pillowcase, catching a glimpse of him sitting at my desk, looking at my drawings aimlessly. "It is."

"Aren't you going?" I sigh at his question, again, and bury my face in my pillow again. He's the only one of the frat guys that I let into my room — I should ban him from coming inside too.

"Yeah, uh, Harry hasn't called me yet. It's still early."

I don't bother looking up at Seth because he's either nodding, or looking at me suspiciously. And I don't care for either of those reactions.

It is the twentieth of April, and it is Freya's birthday. And it's 5:49 in the afternoon so yeah, it's also early for Harry to call me. But the thing that's not giving me any peace is the fact that I hadn't gotten a call from him yesterday, or the day before, or at any point during the past two months, other than the one time he dropped by to tell me Freya's gone home. Apart from that, absolutely nothing. And the chances of him calling me today, on her birthday, are slim, if not non-existent.

"Yeah, I wanted to ask if it's okay for me to come with you?"

For the first time today, Seth's words make me smile humorously. "You can't stand the thought of me partying and yourself not?"

"No but like, if there's a party of adults out there, I don't want to miss it. And you're also invited, I'm sure you can bring a plus one."

My smile falters; you're also invited. He's clearly not as clairvoyant as I'd like him to be.

"Seth?"

"Hm?"

"Do you think I made a mistake by letting Leanne go?"

"You made a mistake by being with her in the first place, let me tell you," He says immediately after my question, which takes me aback; I was sure he'd be shocked by it and then spend five minutes searching for the right words to say. Guess not. "You can see from a plane that she's in love with you. What you did is kinda cruel, actually."

"Then how come she never said anything?" I snap, turning my head to the side so I can see him with my left eye. "I mean... it's not like we had sex all the time, we talked. We went out for coffee, and even when we were here, we weren't going at it 24/7. It's not like she didn't have the time to tell me if anything was on her mind."

"Why does it matter anyway?" Seth shrugs, "Would you've done something about it?"

I turn my head so my face is in the pillow again — he doesn't know, but I've spent days asking myself the same thing.

I've known from the start that being with Leanne would be 10 times simpler than being with Freya. And yet, there was always something dragging me towards the brunette with too many problems and the attention span of a goldfish. I've never thought about it like something where I had a choice, it's always been Freya and only Freya, but now, when we're broken up and that's clearly not going to change, I just want to think about my options if nothing. If Leanne really does have feelings for me — something that everyone but me has magically noticed — that wouldn't be the worst thing in the world.

"You're kidding me." I wince at Seth's dead serious tone, "You're actually thinking about it?"

"Well, I mean," I turn to my side, so I'm fully facing him- him and his astonished face. "If-if it doesn't work out with Freya I could-"

"Stay single, that's what you could do," He frowns at me, "Being single is better than being with someone you don't even give a damn about."

I frown too, but for the complete different reason. "Excuse me," I start, laughing with no humor in my voice, "But who are you to tell me that?"