rays of sunlight // Antoine Griezmann

Chapter 17

A few days later, Antoine phones me, early in the morning. I'm feeling relatively alright this morning, and even was doing some cleaning in the attic. It was hard, but I was just keeping my distance from memory lane, deciding to be a little more practical, by throwing out all the stuff that is just plain trash. My phone starts buzzing in my pocket, and I pick up, saying, "Hey, Antoine?"

"How are you feeling today?" I find his check-ins of how I'm doing to be just the sweetest thing. He cares so much.

"Better than I have felt in a while."

"That's good to hear..."

"Any other reason you called?"

"Uh, yeah... Have you told... Eden, yet?"

"No one knows accept the doctor, you, me, and my therapist."

"I think you need to tell him soon enough, Belle. I know you've been dreading it, but best just get it over with, right? I mean, if you're feeling well enough today, maybe it's a good day to do it?"

I really am not in the mood to ruin my less bad mood, but I understand what he is saying and it makes sense. No one wants to go through something tough like that while feeling like crap. Today will be a better day to do it, although I don't think any day is going to be a good day to tell Eden he got me pregnant.

"Yeah..." I sigh. "I guess you're right, Antoine... I will do it today."

"Want me to drive you there? To his house?"

I sigh. "Yeah, that'd be great."

"You could just come over to my house, then, now, and we could get in my car?"

"Right, sure," I respond, remembering he lives right next door. "I'll be over in a minute."

As promised, I knock on his door shortly, and he opens the door. He's wearing a black hoodie, a white collar showing through underneath, and black sweatpants. His hair is side swept, and it looks nice. I blurt, "You look nice today, Antoine."

He grins. "I was just actually thinking the same about you. Your hair looks nice tied back like that in a ponytail. And those earrings look nice on you. Very nice. And did you do your makeup?"

I feel myself blush, and I glance away at the ground. "Thank you, Antoine... I did do my makeup."

I look up at his brightened face as he says, "You should do that more often." He then walks passed me, into the sunny summer day, to his car. I follow him. I wish I didn't have to do such an awful thing today. It's so nice out... And Antoine is so nice, too.

I give him directions to Eden's house. I know them well, because he has always expected me to drive to his house. He has never picked me up in his nice sports car.

Eden's sports car isn't nearly as nice as Antoine's. I smile softly at that thought.

Antoine surprises me by saying, "You should do that, more, too."

"What?" I ask.

"Along with doing your makeup, you should smile more. It brings out your beauty."

Again, my face heats up, despite the air conditioned car. "T- Thank you."

"Of course."

He pulls up to curb in front of Eden's house, kisses my forehead, and says, "Good luck. I'm right out here if you need me, remember."

"Yeah... Thank you so much, Antoine. It means so much." I then walk up to his house, ringing the doorbell. I know he'll be home.

He is, and he opens the door for me, wearing a Nike sweatshirt, a fancy watch, and a black leather jacket. "Hey, Belle," he says, his face becoming hungry at the sight of me. "So glad to see you here. Feeling better?"

Like you care, you monster.

"Can I come in?" I ask.

"Of course," he says, opening his door to me. I slip in. I've been in here so many times. It has always felt like hell, except for at the very beginning. Now it feels like the deepest layer of hell.

I sit down at his dining room table. He looks at me, confused. He's expecting me to head straight to the bedroom. "What is it?" I ask. "Expecting me to go have sex with you?"

He looks even more confused, sitting down across from me. "Yeah?" Eden has always been quite blunt.

"Well, I'm sorry. I am afraid I don't want to."

"Huh?"

"Okay," I sigh, glancing away from him. "Let me say this bluntly. Really bluntly, because there is no other way to say this clearly. Eden, I am pregnant, with your kid."

He stares at me a few seconds, before saying, "Aren't you just gonna abort it?"

"No."

"Oh, come on, Belle. You'll ruin your body if you don't why would you do that? We're too young to be having a ki-"

My eyes are watering, but I say the words, "Eden, I am not your sex machine. I am a person, and this is painful for me, but I am not going to abort it. I understand you only care about me for my beauty. I know that. We both do. And if you can't take it that I'm not going to be pretty while I'm pregnant, and I won't be having sex with you every night after the baby is born. So if you don't like that, then maybe it's best we break it off now."

"Sure," the monster says, a smirk breaking out on his face. "It's not like I'll be missing you much. I have other girls, you know. I use them 'til I can't, but I have plenty more. So leave. I could care less, now that you're not what I want."

I stare at him, mouth slightly open, eyes watering. Tears start streaming, of anger. My eyebrows lower, and I say, without thinking at all, "Good! I have my own man, too! And he's a lot better than you! He actually cares about me, and he's a lot more good-looking too! Not that looks really matter!" I'm yelling at him.

Then I stalk out of that house. Feeling broken, crushed, refreshed, and angry, all at the same time.

Antoine gets out of his car, and I fall into his arms.