Just A Friend?

[15]: Flashback

"Thanks..."

My eyes fell on his lips, his perfectly pink and so soft lips.

Kiss him.

My next action I didn't even think about.

I kissed him.

I wrapped my arms around his neck as my lips pressed against his.

Shit I'm kissing him...and he's not stopping me.

I could feel our bare stomachs pressed together, I loved the feel of our skin touching. The next thing I know, his arms are under my thighs as he lifts me up before placing me down on my bed.

Gasping as my back bounced on top my quilt, I felt Ash's tongue sweep through my mouth. God he tasted good, better than what I remembered.

My fingers began to run through his hair as our kiss got deeper, my body leaning up into his. His hand curving around my back and up into my hair before pulling me over so I was now on top of him. Straddling his thighs our kisses continued, my lips tracing his jaw, his hands gripping at my arse.

Holy fuck this is really happening right now...

And like I told Fin, I wasn't putting a stop to this, I'd wanted it for so long.

I wanted him so bad.

I was flipped back onto my back, Ash's lips now moving down my neck onto my chest, his hands rubbing and gently squeezing my breasts through my top. I was in heaven. I could feel how hard he was through his pants, slowly grinding his bottom half into mine, it was driving me crazy. He wasn't doing anything to rush me through which I appreciated but damn he was turning my body on so much, his fingers playing my body like he was an expert at it.

Which he probably is with the amount of girls he's been with.

Don't think about them now; just think that he's finally kissing you.

For a while now his lips had been kissing the same spot on my neck, just below my pulse; I could feel it pounding away. His fingers were tracing down my stomach, circling my belly button before running along the top of my bikini bottoms. A shiver ran over my body I'd never felt before and it went straight down to my core. Oh wow! My fingers clutching at his shoulders as his hand dipped between my legs over my bikini making me gasp in surprise.

I was flipped over again so he was lying on my bed then flipped back over so I was. Now that wasn't a good idea.

With all the drinking I'd done tonight, moving back and forth wasn't any good for my stomach. I couldn't believe it, why now?

Ash was kissing down my neck again when I pressed my hand against his chest to push him off me but he didn't budge. I had to push him a little harder and he pulled away panting.

"Everything okay Lou?" He asks, his voice raw with lust.

I quickly shake my head and move from beneath him.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have kissed you back...but I couldn't help it..." he begins to say as I get off the bed as quick as I can whilst gagging.

Keeping my mouth clamped shut I moved quickly to my bathroom, "Oh shit, you're going to be sick." I hear him say getting off my bed and following me as I lift the toilet lid and empty my stomach.

I feel him pull my loose hair back off my face and re-tie my hair. Once again I empty my stomach as he gently rubs my back to sooth me.

"I'll go grab you some water, hang on." He whispers, and I hear my bedroom door open.

For the next couple of minutes my head is stuck down my toilet, in between wiping my mouth and nose and rubbing the tears out of my eyes. I hated being sick.

Ash brought me two glasses of water, one to wash my mouth out with now and sip and another to place next to my bed. I cleaned myself up, finding a make-up wipe to remove whatever make-up I had left on my face and brushed my teeth twice before heading back into my room. Ash was sat on my bed on his phone, smiling at something. His eyes met mine when he realised I was stood there and he grinned.

"Let's get you to bed." He says picking his top up off the floor and putting it over my head. As he went to turn off my light I clocked what was making him smile on his phone.

There on his messages was a photo off a topless Tina in a tiny thong, blowing a kiss to the screen.

Feeling my heart just hurt I crawled under my quilt and lay down. Nothing I did would ever make him want me when he had girls like Tina sending him pictures like that. I'd never been naked in front of anyone before, never mind sending boys indecent pictures of my body. And if that's the kind of girl Ash wants then I'm definitely not right for him.

My head still felt a bit dizzy from earlier so I closed my eyes trying to get to sleep, I still can't believe I threw up whilst I was so close to being with Ash. I swear there must be some higher power keeping us apart.

I felt the bed dip behind me as Ash got under the quilt and wrapped his arm around me, pulling me closer to him. I could feel his breath on my neck as he spooned me.

"Sorry about earlier..." I whisper. I was so embarrassed, who throws up whilst making out with a guy. I bet Tina doesn't. I wish I'd not drank as much as I did now.

"Don't worry about it Lou, we all make mistakes. Night."

"Night" I barely even breathe out.

A mistake. Again.

**End of Flashback**

"Lyd are you okay, you've gone really pale." Ayla says tugging on my arm.

My stomach felt like it had dropped a thousand feet. A mistake. And my heart was torn in two. We all make mistakes. Remembering what he said to me.

I could feel everyone's eyes at our table on me, I needed some fresh air.

"Lou what's wrong?" Ash asks, I raise my head to look at him. His eyes worried, and his hand reaching out to me.

I stood up from the table and shook my head at him before walking out.

*~*~*~*

Was it a mistake?

Did Ash really mean what he said?

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