Give me a reason to stay...

Chapter Twelve

After dad parks the van he taps my shoulder to wake me up, he tells me to stay put and he'll come over to help me. I look out the windshield and see everyone at the table and door of the clubhouse. The door opens and I look to see Happy opened it, he undoes my seatbelt.

"Do you want me to carry you or do you want to try and walk?" He asks me and dad laughs while he grabs my bag. I roll my eyes at dad and tell Happy I want to try and walk. He helps me out of the van and holds an arm around my waist to keep me steady. We make our way to everyone and they start to cheer and everyone hugs me one by one.

"Do you want to go lay down and take some medicine?" Happy ask me after everyone starts to make their way inside. I nod my head at him and he helps me inside guiding me to his room with dad behind us with my bag, he unlocks the door and walks me over to the bed. Dad sets my bag down and tells me he will check on me later.

Happy helps me take my shoes off and gets me comfortable before going to the kitchen to get me a water bottle so I can take my medicine. When he comes back he hands me both and I take one at a time and he laughs at me, when I'm done he takes my bottle and sets it on the nightstand and tells me to get some sleep while making his way to the door..

"Please stay?" I plead with him, he looks over to me and nods coming to sit next to me. He sits his back against the headboard and tells me to set my head on his lap. He runs his fingers thru my hair, trying to get me to fall asleep, I'm almost there when I decide to ask him something.

"Hap should I just go back to Belfast? I have caused the club so many problems the last couple weeks. Should I just leave?" He take a deep breath and exhales slowlys.

"Little one I want you safe and if you think going to Belfast is what is for the best then go." He lifts my head and stands up, moving towards the door. I sit up in pain and stare at his back, he sits his head on the door.

"Happy what's wrong? I can't stay after all the trouble I caused. I don't know what else to do." I shrug at him but he doesn't turn around.

"If you want to go then go." He says to me flatly.

"I don't want to go. What are we doing here Hap? You didn't talk to me for over a year but refuse to leave my side. Tell me what I feel isn't one sided Happy." I whisper the last part so I'm not even sure he heard me.

"I couldn't talk to you little one, I finally got Manny out of the picture and he was back in your bed not even hours later. On top of that the little stunt you tried in the garage and Jimmy trying to take you out. I wont put my wants over your safety and I think your dad is right to want to send you to Belfast but selfishly I don't want you too but I can't watch you be with anyone and end up hurt again." He says finally looking back at me.

"I don't know what else to do, give me a reason to stay?" I say to him but he doesn't say anything so we sit in silence.

"I cant give you a reason to stay Ashlynn that isn't selfish." He finally says and walks out the door. Leaving me alone for the first time in days. My mind runs a million miles and I can't shut it down. I just keep thinking how stupid I was to think that Happy would ever want me. The night I let Manny come back and Happy beat the shit out of him and Manny made the comment about him wanting me hasn't left my mind but then Happy quit talking to me and the guys went to Stockton.

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Five weeks later I was getting my bags packed to go back to Belfast. I had to wait until I was able to get my cast off and my ribs healed. Ribs were still sore but I just told everyone I felt great. Tonight was my last night and we were having a send off party that I didn't care or ask for but Gemma and Tara insisted.

In the past five weeks Clay killed Piney and was voted out but didn't get the mayhem vote due to Bobby and then Bobby left. Everyone has been whispering about him going nomad. Opie hasn't been much to be around. Gemma is dating a new guy named Nero. I like him and think he's a good influence for her. Oh, and Happy is back to avoiding me. He'll watch me from afar but won't say a word.

I've been staying in Manny's old room. No one has seen him and Alvarez has been around and just confirms he's still in Yuma. I finish zipping up my last bag when I hear Lyla yelling I run out of the room and see Ima walking out of Opie's room. I follow her shanky ass to the bar and slam her face down on it and pull her back up by her hair. The guys come running in when I throw her to the floor she swings hitting me in the face twice and I hit her over and over until I feel a pair of arms pull me off of her I wipe my mouth.

"Stupid bitch how many time have I told to stop coming around here." She tells me she was invited so I lunge at her again and get a couple hits in before I'm picked up again and dragged away from the bar down the hallway. I turn to see Happy, he looks pissed. He sets me down and pulls his shirt up and wipes the blood from my eyebrow and mouth.

"Fuck you." I say and walk down the hall and to the bar. Ima's gone and Gemma is standing at the end of the bar with Nero and she's giving me a questioning look. I reach over the bar and grab a bottle of jack making my way to the ladder so I can go to the roof.