A Girl Like Her

Chapter 25.

"Yeah, sorry Zander. I don't mean to keep zoning out like that," I breathed a dry laugh, pushing my plate of food away. "It's okay, I'm actually not hungry anymore honestly." I leaned my arm against the table, bringing my hand up to my cheek as I stared at the muscles flexing in his arm. I wanted to look anywhere but at his eyes. He was too observant for his own good and part of me feared he'd eventually figure me out. He'd be disgusted with me. He'd blame me and tell me I was nothing but damaged goods. He'd say a girl like me would deserve everything rotten that'd happen and more.

My stomach twisted in knots at the vision of Zander possibly finding out. I could never tell him. I could never risk letting him find out all those assumptions were probably true. Truth be told, I was starting to like having Zander around to lean on. He listened to me even when I had minimal words to say. His presence was enough. No matter what, he always tried to make me smile. He was always there when I never knew I needed him to be there.

"Don't worry about it Lala," his head craned, his eyes searching my own to hold me hostage under his gaze once more. "I'll pay and then we can head out, okay? I've got one more place I want to take you. I think you'll have fun." He grinned, showing off the pearly whites of his teeth. His smile was too innocent; too genuine. God, everything about Zander seemed too good to be true.

I nodded anyway. "Sounds great," I smiled back, keeping my lips closed as I watched him stand up to go pay our bill at the counter. My eyes wandered on their own accord, trailing through the seemingly endless sea of people crowded around tables. The diner was pretty small and the tables were all relatively close together, yet somehow not toppling over everything. I looked at the happy faces. People's lips were moving so animatedly as other listeners were smiling attentively. I found my lips curling the slightest in longing. I wanted so bad to be that happy and carefree again. I wanted my ignorance back. I wanted my happiness back altogether.

Then, as if all at once, it seemed as though my breath caught in my throat. A few tables away, alone and isolated, sat a man. He was wearing a dark hoodie and dark pants. There was no sunlight within the building, yet he was wearing a pair of sunglasses that made him look so out of place in the small,  crowded diner. His menu was up, shielding the lower half of his face but I still saw the edge of the familiar scar he possessed. The scar that I left was more prominent looking even though I could only see the lower part of it. The torn edges of his skin rippled beneath his eye, exposing what my nails had done because the sunglasses could only hide so much. As disgusting as it was, I gulped back the vomit rising inside me. My fingers gripped the edge of the table, never once letting my gaze leave the edge of his scar. The knots in my stomach grew tighter. Images of that night flashing through my head like it happened only yesterday.

"Pl-please just let me go," I whimpered out helplessly. My voice was so hoarse from the screaming. I laid there broken and defeated. Yet, I was determined to fight until my last breath. "I'm sorry I won't tell anyone I promise. Please. It hurts." I tried again. My arms ached from how tightly they were being pinned to the concrete. Tiny little rocks dug painfully into my back and every nerve in my body was buzzing in agony. Places in my body screamed with a searing pain I've never experienced before.

My words once again fell on deaf ears. Lucas' face came into my view. Blood streamed down his face from when my nails dug into his skin. I got him good.  I wanted to smirk at him so bad but the muscles in my body wouldn't let me. He came closer to me, his eyes full of uncertainty. He was the only person who looked like he would rather be anywhere else then above me. I couldn't tell if my mind was trying to make stuff up in its drugged and drunken state, but it almost looked like pity in his gaze.

"Don't just fucking look at it. Show her what happens when she tries to disobey. Go on. Do it." Shane's sinister voice was somewhere in the background. I couldn't see anything past Lucas' bloody face and empty eyes. 'It'. Shane had just called me an 'it'. Somewhere deep in the pit of my stomach, it stung to be referred to as something other than a human fucking being.