Waiting On You [18+]

72

After a moment, Naomi swallowed as she tried to breath though every word of what was just told to her. The brutal honesty of it. How there was no sugarcoating - her therapist just told her that.

"So you're saying I shouldn't be with him?" Naomi asked quietly, hating that everything her therapist had just told her was the truth, but she couldn't quite grasp what she was trying to tell her from the entire conversation

Now she wasn't trying to break up with Theo or find any excuse to, but the fact that this topic had just happened to come up made her start doubting everything

Not hers and Theo's relationship, but just whether she took the right decisions in life. Like if the one yes she made years ago caused her to become who she was today. Or the one no she said to a friend caused a domino effect.

All these little decisions can lead to big life changes and now, now she had a massive decision to make and her therapist wasn't helping her

She wasn't helping because now she was doubting everything.

"I'm not saying anything - that might just be your interpretation of what I just said. That's what you took from it. If your mind immediately went to the fact that you believe you shouldn't be with him - then you need to stop and think. You need to know what you want. Not what he wants. Not what you should do to protect him. What you want. What's best for the both of you" her therapist tried to explain that this was a starting point for Naomi.

This, the Naomi sat across from her was a new woman. She was the one who ready to start her life, her career, friendships. She needed to consider what and who she wanted to take forward with her. She needed Naomi to stick to healthy habits and if this relationship with Theo wasn't as healthy as Naomi originally thought it to be because of how much she was hiding in it, then maybe it might not be the one.

Or maybe, her therapist was opening her eyes to the idea that her and Theo were and are good together, but they both needed Naomi to break old habits and continue to make positive progress by opening up and understanding that sex was a positive. But only when it was for communication within pleasure, not used to hide. Not used for secrets and not used for distraction.

"Ok" Naomi mumbled, hating that whenever her therapist helped her out with one thing, a million other new problems came up and they'd need to speak on that

But the one problem was the time limit of these sessions. She'd grown to like therapy and now, now her time was running out because she only had five more minutes left of her session and she needed answers. She needed to ask this.

She needed to know.

"Naomi?" Her therapist frowned, "it looks like something is playing on your mind - what aren't you telling me?" She asked because she knew she'd given Naomi some harsh realities, that definitely felt like she'd just thrown ice cold water over her, but now, now she looked even more stressed

"I-" Naomi stuttered, not even sure if she wanted to tell her therapist the truth about Mariam and the New York offer.

"Yes?" She smiled, trying to ease Naomi into telling her. She wasn't the bad guy and she needed Naomi to remember that. She was just a helping hand. Someone to help let all those trapped feelings out and overcome ghosts from the past.

"I got a really big opportunity and I-" she paused, she had to ask herself, was she asking for advice about what to do, or did she simply want someone to tell. Someone who could give their ten pence of their own opinion as well as congratulate her and not judge her decision. Or did she want someone to to completely pick for her so she didn't have to stress about making the wrong decision herself

"Go on, Naomi" her therapist, gestured for her to continue because she couldn't say anything until she knew how Naomi felt about this big opportunity

Glancing over at the clock, Naomi noticed it was one minute until the end. Until her session was over and she had to walk out of that door. She had one minute till the very next time she saw her therapist she would've made one of the biggest decisions of her life

"Naomi?" Her therapist called out, wanting to know what was bothering her

Seeing the clock get to the number six, meaning that she had thirty seconds left to spill what was on her mind - she practically word vomited it out. "I have this reallyreallyreally big opportunity with my internship placement - they wanna move me to New York and finish my degree at FIT, and I'd loved to do it. It would be my dream come true - it really would be, but the deadline is tomorrow! I don't- I can't. I can't just leave everything behind, everyone. What about Theo? What about my friends. What about-" Naomi rushed out

And time...

The familiar beeping of the alarm indicating that her time was up, went off and Naomi exhaled heavily at the fact that her time was up.

Dismissing the alarm and shutting it off as she already noticed Naomi reaching for her phone off of the coffee table, her therapist stopped her.

"Now Naomi, don't think you can just throw that on me and I'm gonna just let you leave?" Her therapist called out as she identified it as a doorknob moment

How she hadn't experienced many of these, but Naomi was definitely a handful and she knew it.

"But our times up" Naomi acknowledged the obvious as her therapist made no move to start packing up

"Yes, but we've still got something pretty important to discuss, don't you think?" She raised her eyebrows as Naomi sat back down and awaited her therapist's response to her word vomit of a retelling of the Mariam NewYork offer

"Okay, to start off - what I will say is that this is an amazing opportunity, congratulations on achieving that, but I am not here to make this decision for you. This is your life, Naomi" her therapist reminded her

Ugh, that's already one option out of the window

Continuing as she could tell Naomi just wanted to know what she thought of the whole situation, her therapist said, "Now, this is a massive decision and I can tell that you already know that. But I think deep down you also know what you want" making Naomi furrow her eyebrows because she definitely had no clue what she wanted

"Now, you're looking at me like what the hell - but deep down you know and if, just if you sit back and let yourself just think about it. You'll see the path you want to go down. There's always been an answer and you just aren't ready to say it aloud"

"I don't understand" Naomi interrupted

"Don't get frustrated with yourself because that's not going to help you. Look, I know you're scared - you have every right to be, especially when the deadline is tomorrow of all days, but regardless of your decision you know that you did it for a good reason"

"Listen, you've been through a lot - a lot more than most people but you made it through. You survived. And I can tell you one thing, I can tell you that you didn't go through all of it for nothing - every decision, every moment, every flaw - lead you to this very path. This path you're on now and don't forget it. You're allowed to make mistakes - you're allowed to duck up, but at the end of the day, it's your life and your life only. Now do what you feel is right"

"Okay?" Naomi said, still not understanding how this was helping

"Whatever you decide, do it for yourself" she said as she gently, placed her hand on Naomi's shoulder, "You and only you know yourself and what you truly want and I want you to remember that"

Despite the lack of answers she'd received, Naomi knew it was time to go. She knew that her therapist couldn't just give her the answer or a more persuasive argument for one side over the other, so this would be the best she'd get.

This was it.

"Thank you" Naomi smiled, "thank you Dr Davidson" she waved to her as she began to exit the room

Walking behind her as she shook her head smiling at a girl she knew definitely had a bright future ahead of her, she said something quietly, "Scegli sempre te stesso, l'amore può aspettare"

And then waved her goodbye as she said, "Please, call me Kiana" Dr Kiana Davidson smiled at Naomi