୨・┈﹕✦ : Dirty Little Secret.﹕✦﹕┈・୧

࿐ ִֶָ. Sweet ִֶָ

Once I got home, I detransformed and began to silently sob on my bed. I ruined everything as soon as it started getting good, what's wrong with me? I thought to myself.  I'm a walking bad luck charm and there's nothing I can do to change that. Suddenly, I heard a shattering noise coming from my balcony. I grabbed a pocket knife off of my desk and braced myself. I slowly crept up the stairs and took a deep breath before swinging open the hatch.
"Marinette?" Chat Noir stood in front of me. I felt my heart tighten.
"Chat." I whisper as a wave of fatigue hit me.
"May I come in?" He smiled softly.
"Mhm." I nodded and led him down my stairs, holding back tears.
He immediately sat down on my chair, his legs spread out and his hands folded together while staring down at the floor. I glanced at him and sighed.
"Thank you for saving me." I wasn't in the mood to thank him for anything, but I couldn't let him see how upset I was. He looked up at me and sat up properly.
"You're welcome. But, I need you to tell me something."
"Anything." I replied.
He paused. It was like he wanted to ask me something but changed his mind.
"What do you know about Ladybug?"
"I know that she's a superhero who protects Paris."
"Cut the crap, Marinette. Do you know her identity?"
"What are you talking about?" I jolted up from my seat.
"Why wasn't she there today? I know you know why." He stood up and looked down at me.
"I don't know! What the hell is up with you?!"
"You need to tell me who she is." He finally softened his tone.
"Chat I don't know-"
"You do. You do know."
"I'm not telling you."
He took a deep inhale and shook his head angrily. He threw himself back down onto my chair and shut his eyes.
"I'm sorry." I mumbled.
"No, I'm sorry. Her not showing up earlier was just my breaking point. You could've gotten seriously hurt." He frowned. I moved myself closer to him and put my hand on his.
"It's okay." I said while he gently grasped my hand.
We sat silently for a moment. Having his hand in mine made me want to cry again.
After a few minutes of listening to nothing but the faint noises of cars outside, I had trouble holding back my tears. My eyes filled up with them and my lip quivered.
"Marinette?" Chat turned his body around to face me. I couldn't hold my tears back anymore and felt a few drop down my cheeks.
"Oh, Marinette." He whispered. He put his hands on my face and wiped my tears.
"I'm sorry." I turned my head away from him and wiped my face with the sleeve of my hoodie.
"For what? You haven't done anything wrong." He moved his hand onto my shoulder.
"I think you should go." I kept my head turned but I could just tell that he was frowning.
"Why?" In that moment I envisioned his sorrowful green eyes staring at my back. It made me feel so guilty to the point I felt sick to my stomach.
"Why did you really come here?" I turned my head back around to face him. He wasn't looking at me.
"To check on you."
"You hesitated after you said you needed me to tell you something earlier. What did you really plan on asking?" My heart was racing. I knew that he was onto me, I knew that he knew who I was.
"It was a ridiculous question." He murmured.
"Ask me."
I didn't want him to ask. I put myself in the worst position possible. He knew I was Ladybug, I knew that he knew. Chat wasn't stupid. I was just too afraid to have to confirm it.
He finally picked up his head and faced me. He looked like he wanted to cry.
"Are you-" He quickly cut himself off before biting his lip.
"You know what- No. I need to go." He stood up quickly and rushed to my stairs.
I don't know what happened in that moment, but something was bubbling up inside of me. I couldn't lie anymore. Having to sit next to him knowing that he doesn't know who I really am killed me inside.
"The answer is yes." I blurted.
He swung back around and stared at me for a second.
"No. No it's not. You don't even know what I was gonna ask." He spoke softly.
"I do know, Chat. The answer is yes." I closed my eyes to avoid more tears. He stared at me for a few more seconds before turning back around.
"I have to go." He bolted up the stairs to the balcony and off my roof before I could get the chance to say anything else.
—————————————————————————
NEXT DAY

I dragged myself out of bed at 8 AM to head to school. First period was cancelled due to Ms Bustier being absent so I got to sleep in a little bit. I wasn't in the mood to go to school, I didn't have the strength or energy. I didn't want to see anyone, especially Adrien. I knew he would try apologizing to me and I really wasn't looking forward to that. I didn't put much effort into my outfit, I just threw on a sweater and a random pair of flare jeans. As I was looking through my dresser for a pair of socks, I glanced over at the beautiful pink dress Adrien had bought me. I completely forgot about the dance! I let out a groan and grabbed my socks out of the drawer.
The dance, the talent show, it was all too much.
I bought a ticket for the talent show but I honestly didn't even want to go knowing that Adrien would be there. I sighed and plopped my backpack on my back.

Once I got to school, the only conversations I heard were about the talent show and dance. It wasn't a good start to my day.
"Marinette!" I felt a tug on my arm.
"Ow!" I turned around to see Alya with an upset look plastered on her face.
"Why haven't you been answering my messages? I thought you got hurt!" She hugged me so tight to the point I thought my ribs were gonna break.
"Sorry, Al. I've been busy. But I'm okay I promise." I broke away from her hug, holding her hands with a smile.
"Have you and Adrien talked?" My expression immediately dropped.
"No." I mumbled.
"What he did was wrong. He better apologize!" She linked her arm around mine and began waking with me to Ms Mendeleiev's classroom. I was praying that Adrien wouldn't be there, but as we walked inside he was sitting in the front row waiting for me. I tried not to start cursing under my breath, but I ended up just accepting my fait and sat down next to him.
"Hi Marinette." He said with a smile.
"Hey." I pulled out my notebook and started doodling as if he didn't exist.
"How are you?" That made me scoff.
"How do you think I am?" I replied, still continuing my doodles.
"Listen, I'm sorry about yesterday. I shouldn't have lashed out at you, it was rude and immature. Can you forgive me?" He sounded genuine which made me feel bad. I closed my notebook and looked over at him.
"I forgive you. I'm sorry too, I shouldn't have been so pushy." I smiled at him. I'm not sure why, but being with him made me feel better. Maybe it was because he was like Chat-
No. He isn't like Chat at all. I had to keep reminding myself of that.

After school, it was finally time for the talent show. Me, Alya, and Nino sat in the front rows eagerly waiting for Adrien's performance. We had already gone through a few singing acts but had no doubt that Adrien was gonna outdo all of them.
"What song do you guys think he's gonna sing?" I whispered to Alya,
"I have no idea. Nino knows though but he's refused to tell me." Alya stuck her tongue out at Nino as he rolled his eyes.
"It's a secret for a reason. All I'm gonna say is that it's dedicated to someone, I'm not sure who though." Nino took a sip of his cola.
A song dedicated to someone? It'll probably be directed to the girl he loves. The way he talks about her is so beautiful, there's no way that it won't be directed at her.
Suddenly, it was time for the next act which happened to be Adrien. The second he walked out all three of us started cheering loudly for him. He shot us a quick smile before walking up to his mic. I could automatically tell by the first few notes that the song was "Sweet" by Cigarettes After Sex. One of my favorite songs.
His voice was angelic and soft just like the original song. He had to switch a few lyrics out to keep it school appropriate but it was just as good. I stared up at him and the way the spotlight hit his face, he was beautiful. I had never seen someone so beautiful before in my life. I wanted to live in that moment forever, just glancing up at him and listening to him sing. I wanted to look away, to tell myself it was wrong, but I couldn't. How could I possible direct myself away from someone so breathtaking? Just as I thought it couldn't get any better, he looked at me. It was during one of the instrumental moments of the song. He continued staring at me. I wasn't sure how he could even see me considering the only lit part of the room was the stage, but I tried not to overthink it. He stared directly at me as he sang the next line: "And I will gladly break my heart for you" .
My heart fluttered. I couldn't tell if I was delusional, or if he was singing it to me. I should've turned away, but I didn't. I let him stare at me and continue singing.
"Its so sweet knowing that you love me — Though we don't even have to say it to each other, sweet" 
Why was he still looking at me? Why didn't he face the rest of the crowd? Why me? No, It wasn't possible. Maybe he was looking at Nino for emotional support, or at Alya's camera so that she could get a good video. But it couldn't have been me.

Right?