A matter of pride

Chapter 3

David drove along the track, hoping Dillon Kelly wouldn't be out on his front porch, then feeling like a coward for having such a thought. He'd debated whether it was a sensible thing to do, renting out the neighbouring property, and even though he'd been able to justify it to himself, and to Finlay, he couldn't shake the feeling that he was doing the right thing for the wrong reasons. There was no sign of movement at Dillon's, and no car, though David couldn't recall seeing one the night before and wondered how the man had even managed to get in to the town centre that morning. He'd heard talk that Port Evans had a bus service, which was apparently quite new, but the stop was half a kilometer back from the property he was hoping to rent, which seemed a painfully long walk for someone with Dillon's mobility issues. He wondered if there was a taxi service in town, and whether that might bring forth any new leads, but pushed that line of questioning to the back of his mind as he pulled in to the drive of the empty eco-cabin and caught sight of the owner coming around the side of the house. She gave him a wave and Dave returned it, exiting the car and jogging over to meet her by the front porch."Hi, I'm David, we spoke on the phone," he said with a smile. He was supposed to be just a regular cop who'd transferred to the area and part of that cover was building up a friendly report with the locals, and a local who was also Dillon Kelly's landlady could be a source of very useful information."Lizzy Elmer," the woman replied as she shook his hand firmly. "Gotta say I was surprised to hear from you. I don't get many folks wanting to rent these outside of holiday times. You staying in town long?"David explained that he was new to town and needed somewhere decent to live while he settled in because the motor inn left a lot to be desired. Lizzy laughed at that and agreed wholeheartedly as she showed him inside the familiar little cabin. It was almost an exact copy of Dillon's house and confirmed to David that the guy really hadn't brought a lot with him when he'd decided he needed a change."My partner and I have a couple of these little cabins around the place," Lizzy told him as she walked him through the cozy space. "But we're based on the other side of the national park, about half an hour away. These places all run on solar and I've checked everything's working, and the water tank's full, so it should be pretty smooth sailing, but if you run into trouble, just give us a call, day or night. Any questions?""Yeah," David said, trying to seem casual as he looked out the kitchen window and down to the line of trees that marked the start of the bush-land. "Do I have any neighbours at the moment?" She narrowed her eyes at him and David wanted to kick himself as he tried to explain. "I'm just curious is all. You said you don't get many people out here at this time of year.""Mmm," she replied. "There's one other tenant actually." She paused, lips pursed and arms folded across her chest. Why was everyone so suspicious of him all of a sudden? He used to be good at fitting in with people and seeming gormless, but this woman wasn't buying it. She reminded him of Dillon, with her eyes squinting at him, and he tried to seem like he wasn't absolutely desperate to know what she knew. "What did you say you did for a living?""I didn't," David grinned. "I'm a police officer, just got transferred. So, you said I had a neighbour? Not the sort to be throwing loud parties or disturbing the peace I hope."He'd expected his lame attempt at humour to fall flat but Lizzy laughed and shook her head. She definitely knew Dillon then, because he definitely wasn't the house party type, and her next answer was much friendlier."No, he's quiet. No parties. But what about you? Are you on your own? No wife? Kids?" He shook his head. "Girlfriend?" He shook his head again and she looked thoughtful for a moment before giving him a searching look. "Boyfriend?""Not at the moment," he confirmed and watched as a grin spread across the woman's face."Well, David, like I said, my partner and I are only a phone call away if you need anything. She and I run a reptile relocation business as well as these cabins, and a bit of maintenance in the park itself. It's mostly rescuing snakes from peoples houses and cars," she explained when David gave her a confused look. "I studied veterinary science in Adelaide with Dillon before I moved out here, it's how we met. He's pretty shaken by the way, so I don't mind you keeping an eye on him, but don't push it. He's here to rest."David nodded. Not much got past Lizzy Elmer it seemed."You're his friend then? Funny, last night he said he didn't have anyone to call."Lizzy snorted at that and began to walk back toward the front door. David followed her and took the keys when she held them out for him. She didn't seem keen on telling him too much, and while he admired her loyalty, it was also frustrating. He wanted to know more about the mysterious Dillon Kelly, not for any professional reason, he admitted to himself, but because he wanted to understand the man, and why he was hurting. And he wanted to help."Dillon's independent," Lizzy told him with a roll of her eyes. "Always has been. To a fault. But he's also an idiot sometimes. He should have called me. If... if he gets in trouble at all, if he's not coping, I mean, you call me. And you catch the dickhead that broke in to my property too. I expect to kept in the loop about that. Martin who runs a security place in town'll be coming over later to put new locks on Dill's doors, and the windows because I'm not going to let that happen to him again. There's no room for petty thieves and thugs in this town, it's got enough problems. Alright?""You don't have to tell me twice. Cop, remember? It's my whole reason for being, to catch the bad guys and thugs."He shot her his most charming smile but she didn't return it. She cocked her head to the side instead, and gave him a searching look."I've never met a gay copper before. When I was a kid the local cops used to pretend they didn't know my parents were trying to beat the gay out of me each night. When I ran away they delivered me right back to it, every time. They just didn't want to know.""The force has changed a bit since then," David told her somberly. He'd heard so many stories like hers over the years, and it hurt every time, knowing the profession he'd chosen, and loved, had left so many scars on his community, and the people he served."Don't tell us that," Lizzy told him, but when David went to argue she gave him a look like a mother hen that shut him up immediately. "Show us. Show Dill. When he had his... accident, the cops treated him like a criminal instead of the victim. It wasn't pretty. So if you want to be some sort of police ambassador you've got your work cut out for you. But," she gave him another look, only now there was a spark in her eye, like she'd stumbled upon a joke and was bursting to tell him. "But I reckon if you really put the work in, and you're keen... you might be just what Dillon needs, and easier than a dating site too."David felt himself blush and hoped it was well hidden beneath his overgrown stubble. Lizzy Elmer was definitely a canny woman. He shook her hand again and promised to keep her informed about the investigation and watched as she strode over to her ute while his thoughts began to spiral. He tried to reorder the facts he knew about Dillon, about the town, about the case. He tried to focus on the facts, to see only what he needed to see to catch the killer, but when he closed his eyes all he saw was Dillon, frightened and stubborn and beautiful. This had never happened to him before, he had never let his feelings cloud a case before, had never been so distracted by a man before, let alone one he'd only just met, but the fact was, Dillon Kelly was sitting at the centre of his mind, and he had no idea how he was supposed to deal with that.*The knock at the door made Dillon jump and for a moment he sat frozen, heart pounding and eyes darting toward the exits, like a 'roo caught in a flood light. He didn't want to be like this. When he' was younger he'd been the sort of kid to take on the biggest bullies in the schoolyard without a thought of the consequences, a scrappy fighter with no concept of his own mortality. Now he was all too aware of how vulnerable and breakable he was, and he didn't like it one bit. The knock came again and he pulled himself together and to his feet as quickly as he could. It wasn't like an intruder would come back the next day, or knock on the door. Thieves traditionally didn't announce themselves, he scolded himself, so whoever it was, they probably weren't a danger."Hello?" came a voice from the porch and Dillon tried to move faster. He recognised that voice. "Hello, Dillon, mate? You in? It's Martin. Martin White. Liz asked me to come 'round and take a look at your locks. You alright in there?"Dillon hobbled to the front door and opened it as he'd done the night before, with the chain lock still on, just wide enough to see who was there. He felt stupid when he saw Martin's wide, friendly grin, and felt his cheeks flame when he heard the man chuckle, but it was a habit he wasn't about to break in a hurry. He scratched at his cheek to hide the embarrassment and kept his eyes down as he closed the door to unhook the chain before opening it properly. Martin was a nice enough guy, had always been friendly on the few occasions when Dillon had met him, but he had no desire to actually be friends with the man. He didn't want, or need, any new friends."Cheers," Martin told him when Dillon moved back to let him in and Dillon tried to pull himself together in order to talk to the bloke properly. There was a certain rhythm to the way the men spoke out here and Dillon didn't want to give any of them the impression that he couldn't hold his own."No worries, mate. Thanks for coming by.""Yeah, Lizzy said you got in to some bother," Martin said, looking about the small space as if he were mentally assessing it for possible weaknesses. "And you know me, I'd do anything for our Liz. I'm playing the long game see, I'll win her over in the end."He winked as if it were a joke but Dillon frowned."You know she's a lesbian, right? Plaid shirt, big boots, live-in girlfriend; she's made it pretty obvious.""Nah, man, it was a joke!" Martin laughed and slapped him on the back, hard. "Just a joke! Thought maybe you were sweet on her, thought I might have to set you straight."He continued laughing and Dillon smiled. He wasn't great at reading cues so it wasn't so unlikely, and if Martin was happy to joke about with him it was probably best to play along."I'm afraid straight's not something I'm familiar with."He expected the larger man to keep right on laughing, and he did, after a pause. It was only a moment, a single beat of his heart, but it sent a sudden chill down Dillon's spine. He was being stupid, he told himself, was seeing problems when there were none and when Martin joked about the smallness of the house, and how tidy it was, and about the town's abysmal bus service, Dillon did his best to keep up with the banter, but he didn't try to mention himself again, didn't bring up the fact that he wasn't straight, even when Martin mentioned again, as he started work on the back door, that he was working on Lizzy and thought he was in with a chance.Another knock on the door made him jump but Lizzy had said she'd come back and so he opened the door a little less cautiously, though still with the chain across, just in case. His breath left him in a rush when he realised it was Officer Sharma at the door, and not Lizzy like he'd expected, and for a second his brain could only register how attractive the man was, with his scruffy stubble, black, curly hair and deep, onyx eyes. He wasn't overly tall either, which suited Dillon just fine. He'd never been keen on having to go up on tip toes to kiss a guy and these days it was just about impossible to do so without pain, so shorter guys were definitely to his taste and-He shook himself, blinking as he realised where his brain had been wandering and looked back at the officer as the blush returned full force to his cheeks. The other man hadn't said so much as hello yet, and was looking at Dillon with concern, so Dillon quickly freed the chain and let him in, ducking back to try and avoid the awkward eye contact that he felt sure was coming. He'd been perving on a guy, in a really unsubtle way, and he wanted to run away and hide for the rest of his life."You alright?" Officer Sharma asked him as he walked in and Dillon fought to suppress the little shiver that passed through him at the warm, concerned rumble of the man's voice. He nodded and angled his chin away instead, to hide his reaction and looked off in to the kitchen where Martin had stopped working to see who'd arrived and Sharma followed the line of his sight. "Oh, g'day. I'm David. I'm renting the next cabin over."Dillon didn't hear what Martin said in reply, or the blokey small talk that went on after that as Sharma walked over to shake Martin's hand. His mind was reeling. Officer Sharma, David Sharma, had moved in next door to him and he had no idea how to feel about that. It was probably a coincidence, he told himself, but it certainly felt odd to have seen the man three times in less than twenty-four hours. He still didn't trust the man, he reminded himself, no matter that he'd been kind and sympathetic the night before, he was still a cop and a stranger, albeit a handsome one. He walked slowly back to the kitchen, using his leg as an excuse, but he couldn't avoid the man for long, not when he was right there in his home, still looking at him with genuine concern."I'm fine, really, Officer," he said, when he realised he hadn't even said hello to the guy. "And Lizzy helped me put my room back in order. I made a list too, like you said, of everything that's missing. It's pretty weird.""What, the list?" Sharma asked, his brows creasing in a way that Dillon's brain informed him was sweet, and he couldn't stop the smile that formed on his lips."I mean, the idea of writing a list of what's missing, writing down what's not there. It was harder than I thought it would be. But the stuff that's gone is pretty weird too. I didn't quite believe it at first."He looked away, hating that he looked like a fool in front of the two men, but when he looked back Officer Sharma still had that sympathetic look on his face and it was hard to believe that he was just doing his job, that he didn't really care."Weird in what way?" Martin asked, and Dillon hesitated. Martin was nice enough but he still didn't want to discuss anything private with him, and the contents of his bedroom counted as private.Sharma seemed to sense his reticence and for a moment their eyes met before he smiled at Dillon and gestured toward the lounge room. "Why don't we take a seat and you can show me the list."There was a second of tension and Dillon's eyes darted between Martin's looming form and Sharma's open one before he nodded and turned toward the other room."I'll just finish up here then, shall I?" Martin called after them and Sharma gave him a smile that was sharp around the edges as he thanked him.Dillon took his time getting to the couch but even at his slower pace he beat the other man to it and looked back to see that the officer was still looking at Martin oddly."Officer Sharma?" he asked tentatively, wondering if the man was about to snap and arrest them both or something equally unlikely, but he just turned around and apologised sheepishly."You don't have to call me 'officer' or anything like that, you know," he said as he sat down, and Dillon sat down beside him, his curiosity piqued. "You can call me David, seriously. This is a small town and the rules are different. Everyone knows everyone and nobody seems fussed about formalities.""You've been here a week and you're an expert?" Dillon quirked an eyebrow, and David grinned at him, a proper friendly grin that was just a little cheeky, and Dillon had to fight to keep himself from actually giggling like a teenager with a crush. David was even more attractive at close range."I'm an expert on many things," David told him in a low voice. "Small towns, home brew beer, thief catching, nineties grunge bands, weird lists of missing items. I'm a man of many talents, trust me."Dillon nodded and looked up in to David's eyes again, feeling his smile widen as he was caught up in the words, like it was a private joke between just the two of them."How are you at sewing?" he asked teasingly and a huff of laughter escaped his nose as David's eyebrows shot up and disappeared in to his dark curls. But he wasn't off balance for long and squared his shoulders proudly, straightening his back as much as the soft couch would allow."I am, in fact, very adept with a needle and thread, Mr. Kelly. My mother taught me well and I am always ready to help should a fabric-based emergency occur. Why do you ask?"Dillon almost wished he didn't have to tell him. It would be much nicer to just carry on joking and making each other smile, but David was a cop and even if he seemed like a decent bloke he was still there for a reason and this was something that Dillon genuinely did need help with."My..." he debated for a moment whether he should tell the truth or hedge, but decided he wanted to see just how understanding Officer David Sharma really was, or whether he was too good to be true. "My flag. My um, Pride flag. I thought it just got torn down in the... the break-in, but when me and Liz tried to hang it back up I realised it was, you know, ripped."He shut his mouth tight to stop himself rambling and waited to see what David would do with the information. He was tense, he realised, ready to try and jump out of harm's way, and as his cane bumped against his knee he felt stupid, because he couldn't run away, if push came to shove. But David just gave him another of those rakish grins, and Dillon felt himself melt a little inside."Mr. Kelly, I am an expert Pride flag repairer. In fact, if I wasn't a cop I'd be doing it full time." Dillon gave him a suspicious look but David's smile remained. "You don't believe me? Okay. I submit, as evidence in my case, my first Pride march. I was seventeen years old and to celebrate the occasion of my coming out I sewed myself a rainbow super hero cape, in my bedroom, in secret."Dillon wanted to laugh; the man's enthusiasm was infectious, but he still had questions about the evidence put forward."Why did you make it in secret if you'd already come out?""Because I hadn't," David said with a laugh at his past self. "I came out to my parents whilst wearing the cape, obviously. I'm not an idiot."Dillon did laugh at that because the idea of David Sharma as a seventeen-year-old coming out to his parents in a handmade cape, on his way to his first march, was entirely darling and he wished he could have seen it. And because he hadn't heard something so innocent and joyful in a long time, and it made his heart ache in a way that was pleasant rather than painful for a change. But that in turn reminded him of his other heartaches, and the laughter died on his lips."And how did they take it? Your parents, I mean? How did they react to their son coming out as a gay super hero?"David tilted his head to the side as if he was playing back the scene in his head and Dillon waited, watching the little parade of expressions that marched across his face as he thought. Even though they'd only known each other a day he already knew a few facts about David Sharma, and one of those facts was that the man wore his emotions very clearly on his face. He'd be rubbish in an undercover situation, Dillon thought. He'd give away his true intentions in a second."My parents..." David said slowly. "They took it better than I expected. My mother cried. A lot. My father went really still, didn't say a word, and walked out of the room. My mother just kept on crying. So I went out to Pride and had a great time with my friends, and my community. And when I came home again... my parents both told me that they loved me very much and weren't about to stop." He smiled wistfully, his voice soft and expressive as he spoke. "It was fairly straight forward, really. How about you?""I never came out to my parents. I, um, moved out of home when I hit eighteen and, and started uni and we just sort of, um, drifted apart. We weren't that close. But my first Pride," he smiled and noticed that David had shuffled a little closer on the couch, like he understood that they were sharing something quite intimate. "My first... my boyfriend Sam, though he wasn't my boyfriend at the time, he brought me along, and bought me the flag. The photo that was stolen, that was taken that day too. Um. He wasn't, he wasn't my boyfriend when we met up at the start of the march, just a friend, but by the end of the day he was my boyfriend. He was... he was great. The first person to actually tell me that it was okay to be a, um, a bisexual with a preference for guys. Most folks tell me I'm gay and in denial but Sam didn't, he just understood."Dillon tried to avoid looking directly at the man sitting beside him. He could tell David was surprised because everyone was surprised when he told them he was bi. Everyone assumed he was gay and most of the time it didn't bother him, he did have a preference for guys, a seventy-thirty split he always thought, but that didn't mean he wasn't going to cling to his identity for all he was worth. He wondered what David Sharma thought of his confession, and whether he was surprised. Then again, in all honesty, Dillon hadn't picked David as gay, so it was surprises all round."He sounds like a great guy," was all David said in response and Dillon did look up at that, because he could hear the questions David wanted to ask, the main one being 'What happened?' but it didn't come and they sat quietly for a while until David leaned across and gave Dillon's hand a squeeze and gave him another, more somber, smile. "Shall we have a look at that list, then? What's so weird about it?""Well, for a start, um," Dillon said shakily, unsettled by what seemed like completely heartfelt kindness. "It's all stuff I've collected at Pride marches and festivals over the years. A necklace; some rainbow bandanas; um, a t-shirt. And the ring. Sam gave it to me. It's the only thing that's really valuable. It's the thing I really want back. And the photo, the photo of course. They're important, you know? They're...""Memories?" The smile had dropped entirely from David's face but his eyes were still bright and practically overflowing with emotion."Yeah," Dillon whispered, gripping the handle of his cane tightly. "Memories."