Rebound // Alfie Solomons

49. Bridge You Burned

"Hiya handsome..." Cora said picking up Charlie. He stared back at her.

"Mama?"

"No..." she coed. "I'm cora... it's alright..."

Cora had been tending to Charlie as Tommy had a mental break down. Charlie was a little thing still but he took to Cora easily. She both hated and loved being with Charlie. 

Cora had wanted kids. wanted a baby of her own to love and cherish. Wanted someone to call her mama. But this little boy, however cute he was wasnt hers. But grace was dead. Tommy wasn't meant to be a father. 

"Mama." Charlie repeated as Cora rocked him in her arms. 

Alfie understood, he didnt like it but he understood Cora needing to be with them. For as much as she hated Tommy she adored his family as though they were her own. 

She called him every day and night, told him how much she missed him. Whenever he asked when she was coming home she felt a sad tug in her chest. Home. 

She didnt have an answer for him. She wanted to come back but she felt a responsibility to Charlie. It made no sense. She hated Tommy and Grace seemed a manipulative cunt as well but Charlie was innocent and needed someone. 

Tommy was gone most nights, Cora didnt know what was going through his head. Perhaps he did love Grace. Perhaps she was the one, but then why was he staring at Cora the whole damn gala. Perhaps it was guilt. Had he been more focused on his wife... Cora didnt know what he was thinking and she tried not to focus on that. Tried not to focus on Tommy, take care of everyone else, as she done before. 

"Hush little baby, Don't say a word, mama's gonna buy you a mockingbird..." Cora sung out softly as Charlie smiled up at her. "If that mockingbird don't sing mamas gonna buy you a diamond ring..."

Tommy watched her silently and couldnt help but think what could have been if he wasnt such a fuck up. If this was their baby and their home, their life... He leaned against the doorframe as she sung softly, lulling Charlie back to sleep. He closed his eyes and pictured this life. The life they could have had.

''If that diamond ring turns brass, mamas gonna buy you a looking glass. If that looking glass get's broke mamas gonna buy you a billy goat..." 

Cora tucked Charlie back in and when she turned around she saw Tommy, eyes still closed. 

"Get some rest." Cora instructed. 

"Cora, I know I fucked up I keep fucking up." Tommy whispered. "But I can't do this without you." 

"Get some rest, Tom." Cora repeated moving past him. 

"Cora." Tommy whined reaching for her. 

"I wanted to be your girl, with your hands on my skin." Cora remarked. "A long time ago. Long, long time ago." Tommy sighed knowing she would never be his but he kept trying. 

"I was ready but you werent, so you jumped from this bridge you burned." Cora went on. "Now I'm here. But not for you. I want that to be clear." Cora informed him. 

"I know." Tommy whispered. 

"I don't think you do." Cora countered. "I'm here for Finn, Ada, Pol, John, Art... I'm here for Charlie." Cora told him. "I know what growing up without a mother looks like." She reminded him. "I love my father, he is a good father. You... I don't know what you are." Cora admitted softly. "I want Charlie to have the best chance, I know thats not you."

She knew she sounded harsh but Tommy needed to get through his head that she wasnt his. Her being here and helping raise his son while he wandered the woods wasnt for him. It was for Charlie and Finn, the rest of his family that she still adored. 

'Get some rest Tom."

Tommy watched her go. Watched her walk away and seal the door. He slid his back down the wall until he sat, knees curled to his chest, head tucked to his knees, heads running through his hair. 

Cora closed the door and moved to the phone. She knew it was late but she called Alfie anyways, he picked up on the first ring. 

"Hello gorgeous." Alfie declared and Cora chuckled. 

"You waiting up for my call?" Cora mused. 

"I told you, I can't sleep without you here next to me." Alfie corrected. "Cyrill has stolen your spot but I will have you know that he is not as good a snuggler as you are." 

"Oh no. I'm getting jealous." Cora remarked. "He stole my spot, I'm going to have to have a talk with him."

Cora fell asleep with a smile on her face and when she woke up she called Alfie again and that smile stayed on her face all day.