TISG 23

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I'd be lying if I say na hindi ako nasasaktan sa patagong pagkikita namin ni Trevor, every time susunduin niya ako sa likod ng hospital, every time kakain kami sa condo niya, every time kailangan namin magkunwaring kaibigan lang siya ni Aidan during events, at every time kailangan namin magpunta sa malayong lugar para magparty or kumain para walang makakakita sa amin. Masakit. Para akong kabit na tinatago. But I can't do anything, this is my karma for putting him in the same situation back then.


"In case nakalimutan mo na, I just want to remind you," Maxine sat on the edge of her bed with her wine glass on her hand. "Ang sabi mo sa akin noon, gusto mo lang na mapatawad ka ni Trevor. Halata namang napatawad ka na niya, baka naman pwede ka ng maglet go," nakangiti nitong sabi ngunit may halong lungkot sa mga mata.



"Hindi mo deserve yan, sis." She added.



I looked at her with sadness, ang bigat bigat pa ng dibdib ko. Inubos ko ang wine ko at napaupo nalamang sa couch niya.



"Gusto ko yung tao eh," I sounded defeated.

She pouted, feeling sorry for me and my situation. Halatang gusto na akong yakapin, but we don't do that. We're not lovey dovey.


"I know but you're hurting yourself. Masaya ka tuwing kasama mo siya pero pag uwi mo malungkot ka naman dahil sa sitwasyon niyo. Halata naman kasing naghihiganti lang siya sa nagawa mo noon," tugon nito. She got up to grab the wine and poured it into our glasses.


I gave her a sad smile. "Our happy moments outweigh all the sadness, Max."


She bitterly scoffed and rolled her eyes. "That's what every tanga person who is in a bad situationship say, Nadz."


_________


"Hope," Trevor called me while he's big spooning me.


I kept my eyes closed and scooched my back closer to him. "Hmm?"


It took a while for him to answer dahilan para makaramdam ako ng kaba. "What?" I impatiently said.


He chuckled and tightened his grip on me. Making my back feel his bare chest beating fast. "I've been wanting to take you out on a... date."


Otomatikong napadilat ang mga mata ko. Tila'y nanigas din ang katawan ko. Date. Fuck. This is the first time he said that word. That word is foreign to us.



"And I know with our situation we can't do it here."


I tried to analyze his voice. He sounded genuine naman. Seryoso ba siya? Kasi ako... nabibingi na ako sa ingay ng tibok ng puso ko.



"Go on," I tried to be subtle about what I feel right now.



"I have a business shit to handle next week in Barbados, do you wanna come with me?" malambing nitong tanong, he then kissed my neck and shoulder.


I turned to face him. Mahigpit pa din ang yakap ni Trevor sa akin. Our faces were so close to each other so I looked at him in the eye. Nakalma agad ang sistema ko nang magtagpo ang mga mata namin.



Napangiti ako sa saya... sa kilig. Naeexcite ako sa plano niya. "Libre mo ba?" pilyo akong napangiti.



My question made him laugh, it was like music in my ears. He mischievously slapped my ass, "yes, ma'am."



Sumakit ang panga ko kakangiti dahil sa kilig. This will be our first out of the country trip. Barbados is such a beautiful place and I just know that we'll have so much fun.



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