Celestia

4

Morning is peacefully quiet in the forest. That's the first thing I observe when my conscious mind awakens. I roll over in bed, eyes still closed, and reach for my boyfriend. I find an empty space. Then I open my eyes. And my gaze fixes on a wooden wall. I whip around and find that instead of a tent in the middle of the pine forest in Not Quite Heaven, I'm in my bedroom at the cabin. I sit up and angrily kick the covers onto the floor as tears begin to sting my eyes.

"No!" I shout in frustration. All the miles we put in yesterday, as close as we might have been, it was for nothing. We were brought back. We can't leave. I eye the stupid lamp on the nightstand and feel a sudden hatred for it. I slap it with all my might and it falls to the floor with a resounding shatter.

Mere moments later, the door opens and Sawyer bursts through, his hair a mess as though he just rolled out of bed and is likewise clothed in his hiking outfit from yesterday.

"Autumn?" He questions, concerned.

"We're back at the cabin!" I shout, throwing my arms out. "We-we got reset! We can't leave!"

He glances around as if he had yet to notice. "Oh."

"I don't want to be stuck here! I don't-" I sink down on the edge of the bed and squeeze my eyes. "I don't want to be dead. I want my dirty bedroom and homework and my crappy life back. This can't be it. Sawyer, it can't be over."

He sits down beside me and wraps an arm around my shoulders. "I know, babe. I wish there was something I could say that would help."

"What is this place?! It's not Heaven! Heaven is supposed to be peace and happiness, and all I've been is in pain and tears. Why aren't you upset? Don't you want another chance at life and to see your family again?" I ask Sawyer, incredulous at his lack of emotion.

"I didn't have any hope to begin with. I guess this place has just made me numb," he shrugs. "I'm just...here, you know? Purposeless."

"I wish I could go numb," I mutter as I wipe my tears away.

"You have to accept this as your fate," Sawyer says.

I shake my head, defeated. This feels as close to acceptance as I can get.

"We can try it one more time if it'll make you feel better," Sawyer suggests.

"Why bother? We'll get reset the next day."

"Well...maybe not if we stay awake."

I give him a funny look. "Stay awake? There's no telling how many days it'll take us just to get out of the forest."

"Maybe we don't need to sleep here. We haven't tried to neglect our human needs. I don't see why we would need them in the afterlife. It's not like we can starve to death."

I feel a lightbulb switch on in my head, and suddenly I feel a newfound hope. "Sawyer, that's a great idea!"

He grins. "What do you say then? One more time, go for the gold?"

"One more time." I nod with a smile and wipe the tears from my eyes.

Suddenly, a strange feeling, like pins and needles, hit my extremities. I stretch my hands in an attempt to make them feel normal again, and then I realize what's happened. I scowl.

"What's wrong?" Sawyer asks.

"My hands are going numb."

He smirks. "Careful what you wish for."

"I really, really wish a portal would open up right here and now that would take us back to the real world," I declare.

He and I wait for something to happen, but nothing does.