Mondler one shots

I thought I lost you

Monica couldn't belive it. she was in bed right now, the moon light shining through her window, and just like every other night she was the little spoon against chandler, entangled in him.

Except tonight was so, amazingly different.

just twenty four hours ago she was be cuddled up with her boyfriend, but tonight and for the next year or so, she was cuddled up with her fiancé.

The last two days was a rocky process with plenty bumps in the road, but everything worked out and was how it should be: they were finally engaged.

their hands were laced together against her stomach, and his breath was trickling down her bare neck. she smiled at the feeling her body had come to recognize so well.

This was her happiness she realized. This was peace in its purest form. She had achieved the key to the next stage in her life. She knew talking about the future startled Chandler, but now it was set in stone. The next few years would be full with a wedding, a honeymoon, and babies as soon as all that was over. She didn't care how much chandler protested, once they were married they would be having babies. No doubt about it.

This was what she had been dreaming of for years, since the age of 15. She was proud of herself, but also thankful. So God damn thankful.

Just as she was drifting off to sleep, she felt chandler shudder slightly against her, swallowing down what sounded like tears. Though his movements were soft and stifled, she was so observant that she knew something was wrong.

"Chandler?" she whispered softly, turning her body over to press against his. she waited for a response but receive it. "Chandler sweetie," she repeated. "sweetie are you alright?"

she felt his body stiffen as he cleared his throat, "i'm okay mon, go back to sleep."

she shook her head and sat up, flicking on her night table lamp. "I wasn't asleep to begin with, what's wrong?"

Chandler closed his eyes, taking a deep shaky breath in. she'd seen him upset and crying before, and though it was perfectly fine with her to witness it, it always caught her off guard. Monica restrained herself from hurrying him along, and gave him him a minute to gain control of his emotions.

"I—" he finally spoke again, looking her in the eyes. "I thought I lost you Monica." tears pooled under his eyes, threatening to fall down his face.

Monica scanned her brain and memory, trying to remember what he was talking about. "lost me? i'm right—oh." it all came rushing back to her. Chandlers plan, what joey had lied to him about and the whole Richard thing. "Chandler I am so, so sorry." she whispered, guilt hitting her like a ton of bricks. "I shouldn't have had Joey say that. I just wanted to suprise you because you always do these things for me and I just wanted it to be—"

He  kissed her softly, cutting off her useless babbling that would get them nowhere.

"i know, i know." he whispered, resting his forehead against hers. "and it isn't your fault. I shouldn't have made that stupid plan. It was risky and i was stupid and I," he took in another shaky breath. "I thought you left and i had lost you."

she quickly shook her head, "you're never going to loose me. you're stuck with me."

He nodded his head, laughing weakly, but a frown quickly resumed on his face. "but it was Richard."

Monica sucked in a breath. She knew how much chandler struggled with her exes, especially Richard. it went beyond the normal uncomfortableness with ex-boyfriends. she didn't even realize how bad his insecurities were until their first anniversary when she had told chandler about her lunch with Richard on the plane to Las Vegas, and chandler thought that Richard was still the love of her life. she knew that that was insane and totally untrue, but he didn't know that.