The Judgement Of Divinity (TMOE #2)

Chapter 40: Not so different

Anthony looked down at the ground, face grave as he sucked in a breath.

"He'll be looking for you. You have to realise that. He will come for you, and whatever mercy he's shown in the past will not be there anymore."

Lucius' shoulders tensed up as the darkening forest suddenly seemed to be closing in around him. Suffocating him.

"No. No, there's gotta be a way!" He shook his head rapidly. "He can still die! You— You must know where the actual paintings are!"

Anthony's face scrunched up, eyes still fixed on the moss.

"I don't."

"How can you not!?" Lucius threw out his good hand. "You gotta kno—"

"Do you think I'd still be here if I did!?" Anthony's voice broke, and he pressed his hands against his head. "If I'd known where my painting was, I would have destroyed it long ago!"

Lucius paused in his panic to stare.

"... Destroy? But... You'd die. For real."

"Yes, I would," Anthony whispered through a trembling breath. "Finally."

"Anthony, why... Why would you want that?" Lucius' mind was in turmoil. "I— I know you're unhappy with how your life is going right now, but... Isn't it better to get rid of Damien instead? So you can be happy?"

Anthony laughed wryly.

"I can't be happy. The more I enjoy life, the worse it gets later. It's all misery in the end."

"But— But you have me, and— And Tom and Richard, and Ethan," Lucius tried, attempting a comforting smile that was immediately drowned by anxiety. "We don't... Last forever, but it's a lifetime if nothing else."

"And I have infinite lifetimes to come," Anthony said through gritted teeth. "Everyone's gonna die before me, no matter how many I grow close to. I'll suffer the loss of all of them."

He gave Lucius an anguished look.

"I'm already tired, Lucius. It's only been three hundred years, but I'm tired. I don't want an eternity of this miserable life."

"But why..." Then Lucius remembered Damien's words about keeping Anthony alive. "... Wait, is... Is he keeping it from you? Like with Cyril?"

Anthony wrapped his arms around his dirt covered knees.

"That's why I've been staying. I can never die without his permission. It may be a pointless attempt, but it's the one option I have."

"But I..." Lucius swallowed, body growing heavier by the second. "... I don't want you to die. I want to be with you."

"How fortunate for you that I cannot reach my painting then." Anthony looked away again with a wrinkled nose. "Not that me staying will matter once he finds you."

"So— So what do we do?" Lucius' gaze darted around, with the threat of Damien hitting him again. "He can't find me, but... I can't leave this town. Not now. Not after all I've done for it."

"Well... I'm sure you'll think of something." Anthony slowly stood up from the ground. "Best be quick about it though."

"Wait, I... I can't move that well," Lucius said as Anthony began walking. "My legs—"

"Find townspeople. Give them a sob story and use them to not be alone." Anthony barely looked back at him over his shoulder. "I'm returning to the mansion."

"You— What!?" Lucius tried to go after him only to tumble over immediately. "You can't leave me here!"

Anthony balled his fists.

"You destroyed the mansion I've lived in for over a century. You've ruined hundreds of years of work, and killed several people I was fond of. Not perfect people, but at least some who tried." He sent a glare in Lucius' direction. "If your plan had worked out you would have killed Catherine, despite the help she's given you."

"Anthony, you can't be serious—"

"How is it surprising that I am!?" Anthony's look made a drastic turn into fury. "There were other ways! You could have talked to me, but instead you went and destroyed the one constant in my life! And you think I want to stay and help you!?"

"He's made you miserable!" Lucius' entire body trembled. "I was doing it for us!"

"For you." Anthony pointed at him. "If you had been doing it for us, you would have talked to me, and actually asked what I wanted."

"There was no other way!" To Lucius' remorse, tears were blurring his vision and his voice had grown thick. "He wanted me dead, and you know he would have succeeded eventually! His death is the only way for us to be together!"

Anthony's chilling look wouldn't budge.

"But he's not dead, and he can never be. So... Perhaps there is no way, then."

Lucius let out a weak breath as the tears escaped his eyes.

"But, I— I love you. I told you. It can't end like this. We'll find his painting and get rid of him, so we can be happy."

Anthony stood in silence at first, but then his concerned frown reappeared and he turned around to walk back with a sigh.

"Then... Let me ask you something." He crouched down in front of Lucius, with a grave, almost sad expression. "If the painting you saved from the explosion had actually been mine... Would you have given it to me, knowing what you know now?"

Lucius was dumbstruck at first, opening and closing his mouth in an attempt to find words. He hadn't given much thought to what would happen to the painting later, but he hadn't considered it a problem either.

"But you— You don't have to de—" His dry mouth made him cough. "You don't have to destroy it. You don't need it. We'll hide it away, keep it safe somewhere, and we will think of something. You can be happy. There's a way, I—I know there is... Somehow, and I promise, I'll do anything to make it happen."

Anthony smiled, letting out a soft laugh before wiping a tear from Lucius' cheek.

"Then how are you any different from him?"

Lucius sat paralyzed as Anthony got up to walk away, this time unable to call out to him. His heart pounded enough for it to hurt, and his body tried to remind him of the other parts of him in pain, but he couldn't feel it.

It was just like always. Even after everything he'd done. After everything he'd sacrificed and everything he'd fought for, he'd still lost.

But you didn't lose. You have your town now, and if those persistent vermin try anything, we'll find a way to dispose of them. You don't need anyone else to be happy. You just need this.

Lucius wrapped his arms around himself as hopelessness engulfed him.

"No, not this," he whispered, gaze sinking to the mossy ground. "Not without him."