You know, you were a dumb kid. Well, at least you gave me that expression on our first day. Imagine, having elementary subtractions in high school, and didn't even get a point? I was marking my brain not to be involved with you, not until my cousin — Tzuyu said to us that she has a crush on you.
Girls going out with girls. New. Everything about romance is new to me as I was a nerd, ugly, and inexperienced. Not that I didn't mind Tzuyu giggling while you two looked at each other but girls... should be with boys, right?
Then there's Nayeon. My best friend since 4th grade. She was dating a lesbian girl called Jeongyeon and apparently, I heard it from other people.
I was feeling betrayed.
I know I may have given the impression of being homophobic but, you can't blame me. I don't know anything. But you know what hurts me the most?
It's because I am trying my best to understand, but none of you trusted me. Not even my cousin, nor even my very own best friend.
I distanced myself but Nayeon made up for our friendship and we're back to being inseparable.
Not until something happened to both you and Tzuyu. I couldn't care less about your relationship as my motto in high school was, "study first" or I'll be homeless when my parents found out I was screwing around in school.
Maybe you two had confessed to each other, whatsoever. Chaeyoung, you were one of the best crushable classmates in our class but I don't care cause I hate your guts.
You hang out with us more often. Even got to the point that we walked together after school cause you wanted to confirm that Tzuyu comes home safely. Aside from Tzuyu and I being cousins, we were also neighbors.
The two of you were awkward with each other. Maybe being embarrassed about knowing that you two had a mutual understanding that's why you talk to me more often than Tzuyu cause I am your friend and there's nothing to be awkward about.
Right?
But Chaeyoung, we were both so dumb for doing that. Most people always praise me for being smart but when it comes to you...
I become stupid.
At first, I didn't feel anything
Every day, we argued
But I guess we didn't hate each other
We have a lot more in common. I hated you first since you took my place in the canteen but, you are apparently, a good, and funny person.
I laughed at most of your jokes, you tease me for stealing my necessity: my handkerchief, and we would run around in circles in our classroom when it was recess just for me to get that back.
You know how important my hankies are to me, I was a frail child and got sick a lot. I also sweat a lot, that's why I can't just go a day without my hankies.
My friends—now, OUR friends after Tzuyu introduced you to us, noticed the change in our relationship. And that was the worst thing I could ever imagine.
So I distanced myself from you, to respect Tzuyu and our friendship. You understood. We pretended as if nothing happened but, one day, Nayeon confronted me.
She said that it was okay and Tzuyu isn't mad. She saw us both having our time and being with each other through silly little things, saying that it's okay for us to do that and Tzuyu felt that both of you and her's relationship aren't gonna work.
I was conflicted. I don't know what to do. I clearly wasn't having any feelings for you but Nayeon just kept on insisting to make you confess your feelings and one night, I did.
Turtle
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