Author's note
A change of pace, I guess haha. I've been thinking a lot about plots with trigger warnings in the songs some of you recommended but this one, it made me think of a little bit fluff one so, here you go!
---
“Little by little
Our memories piled up
I will always keep them
As they were.”
---
[ Year 1990]
You were the best thing that happened in my life.
I remember being so lonely when my father passed away. He was the one who taught me everything. The person you knew and loved; he was the one who influenced her.
He taught me the necessary things in life. If there's a Mama's boy then you can say that I am the Papa's girl.
Papa was the person who was closest to me. He was art himself. Everything he did, I was there. In every stroke I paint, every word I've written, and every song I have sung while plucking my guitar; he was the reason for it.
He introduced me to the magical world of art.
Nothing could've prepared me for his death. This may be a bit exaggerating but, my whole world crumbles apart. My mom and brother were good to me, we were the best family I could've asked for but without my father... I couldn't imagine being myself.
The house reminded me of him. I feel sick to the stomach that I couldn't eat. I imagined the world without him; it was not the same world he introduced me to. The world full of colors I used to have has now turned monochrome.
But you know what? It was the last day of his funeral when I met you. High school was only days away and father and I promised each other to make lots and lots of art.
It may be the stupidest thing I did in my whole entire life. Your father passed away too but you know what pissed me off the most? You weren't even crying but you were doing the opposite. Smiling.
I hated that gummy smile of yours the first time I saw it. Everyone must've been so exasperated when I began loving it a few months after. They even doubted me. I could remember laughing my ass out that day when I told my best friend the truth.
One stare I laid on you for the first time was full of hatred. How could you smile when your parents wouldn't ever wake up anymore? How could you laugh when the person who was there for your whole life is now gone?
I approached you that time and I didn't regret coming to you and scolding you in your face. Remember the first words I said to you? It was a question, rather. A rude one. Looking back, I can only giggle on the old me who was broken and just want something to distract my broken system.
"How can you laugh like that?" I asked with dead eyes, my voice cracked due to crying a few minutes before. I can say that I asked that question to you in a louder voice than my normal one as everyone on your side was looking and mine was too.
But I didn't care about those things for a moment. I was so desperate to be answered cause I wanted to know I was better than you because I cared for my father more than you do.
Your smile never faded in your face. I wanted to rip it all up cause it was making me insecure. I don't know what you've been through but we have lost the same person in our life. And I would never forget the words you respond to me.
