His Voice | Rise! Donnie x Female Reader

REALITY?!

What it's like to have magic, what's it like to bond with creatures of all kinds, what it's like to just be me. But I'm scared of what I'll become. Mom said that if someone finds my magic, they'll hunt me down. Try and manipulate me, because as it turns out, the basic human synergy matches with the yokais. Who would've thought that two things so different would match together? 

And I'm a living form of that. Mom did a ritual on me when I was a kid, to protect me from any harm that might come upon me. But I wonder if it actually will protect me. Dad has always been paranoid when it comes to these mystic things, and mom is scared I'll get hurt. But I wanna try it out. I wouldn't know until I do trial and error. But I'm scared something irreversible might happen to me. 

And that fear is what keeps me stuck on the ground. I'm too afraid to try something new alone, I need someone to guide me through it all. But with my appearance and secrets, there is no one to share with. April is the closest friend I have, and I don't wanna lose her to me being the odd one out. 

I'm afraid she'll leave me before I even explain anything. The only person I can talk to is my thoughts. The characters made up within my mind, the voices that keep me company as everything goes dark. But they're just another version of me, something I made that isn't reality. It's just hallucinations. 

I'm talking to myself, but......

The dreams I've been having lately feels real. Like they're actually there. The Donatello that I've met was oddly different from what I expected. I kinda expected him to be human, never a mutant. What are mutants exactly? Half human, half yokais? Like me? Did my brain think of that? I never thought about mutants before. 

He wore a lot of tech, like armor for battle. I half expected him to be a boy with glasses mostly, and school attire. And now I don't think we would go to school, with a figure like that. I'm not shaming him or anything, rather I kinda feel bad for him. How does he normally get knowledge then? And that also means he doesn't have a lot of friends. 

But I think he'll be alright, his diary logs always mention some type of family. Usually talking about his brothers and father. And April. She's their sister. That's what she meant by found family. Was that why she never introduced me? Wait, what am I saying, I'm just dreaming these things. April wouldn't keep secrets like that, I'm her partner in crime! How will we work together perfectly if she is keeping secrets? She doesn't, that's what. 

Ugh, sometimes your head is playing tricks on you, Y/n. Don't think about anything that will give it an advantage. Think about school work, yeah, school work. I should consider continuing the project, it's due in two more days. I should try and use my creative aspect there. Try and make it look pretty even though everyone's only gonna see it once. That's the point of a distraction. 

So I went back to my desk, and got my equipment ready. I spent more than two hours just talking to myself on the bed, sometimes I wonder if I'm a helpful member of society. I opened my laptop and open the powerpoint and started doing designs for the background. Complementary colours, shades and tints, and just art stuff. It doesn't seem great, but I like doing it. What more can I do? 

But as I started working, those feelings are coming back to me. Like there's someone watching me when there is nobody. And I can't continue wirk this way, I'm getting distracted far more than I wanted to be. I wanna find out why this feeling is stuck in me. I was never scared of being alone, I've always been alone. So why now? Why do I feel watched? Why do I feel the need to look for something? Is someone here? 

I didn't know when, but I got onto the fire escape ladder. My brain wasn't thinking straight, and my body is guiding itself up the staircase. Why am I going up? There was an escape ladder? Why have I never went up here?