Thirty Three

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         Siddharth actually did think about it. He had thought about it a million times over and over again throughout the years. Before they were married, when they were married and after they reconciled too.

     And he couldn't imagine what would've happened if that night didn't happen. Maybe he would've been married to Myra by now.

   Their marriage talks were under way. Both him and Myra knew that it wouldn't be a love match but an amicable one. He couldn't say if it would've been a happy marriage but it would've been a boring one. With Sakshi, nothing was boring. There was something new everyday. He loved her enough to love each new discoveries he made everyday about her.

       "I don't know."

      She then hummed and then the silence settled between them again.

     "I didn't mind the kiss as much as the slap."

      "So, if I hadn't slapped you would life have been different for both of us?" She asked.

       He had never wondered about that. The kiss, the slap and Sakshi always were chained elements in his mind. His imagination had run wild before he even had the chance to stop.

         If they had just kissed and then what? The party was still in full swing. Maybe they could've stolen into a quiet corner and talked. Exchanged numbers. They would've talked and he knew he would've fallen in love very soon.

    But what about her? She had said that because they had kissed there were rumours that she did it because of that bastard. He remembered Sakshi had told him that it had paved the way for them to be together. Would she still have fallen in that trap if they had stayed in contact?

   The part that didn't fit the puzzle was even when he wasn't there, he knew she had many boys in Mumbai and in high society who admired her, why then did she choose Ashwin?

      If she had never talked to Ashwin, if this was a fairy tale and not reality then they would've talked, fallen in love and got married. There would've been an happy ending. Wouldn't it have?

   The only obstacle between them was that she was adamant to not tell him the truth of things. If that night and everything didn't happen, there wouldn't have been a web of lies that entangled them both.

      "I don't know." He said and turned to face away from her feigning sleep.

      Siddharth heard her sit up on the bed roughly. "Why are you here then? If you don't want to touch me or if you're not here to talk, why are you here?"

        "Didn't we promise not to fight?"

          "Yes, get out so that we don't break that promise."

          "Fine."

         He got out of the room and clicked the door shut. He dragged his palms over his face and sighed. He didn't wish to fight her. Not tonight. But things rarely went his way in this household. He felt his blood go hot, she blamed him for not acting like this was normal. He hated the fact that she could pretend that everything was fine. It wasn't fine.

    Everything was over between them and tomorrow he would have to come back to this empty house and just accept it. While she took off and left him. That had always been a thorn at his side, the way she just gave him up.

    And that made him angry. Hadn't he been putting all his time and energy and efforts to keep this marriage afloat? And it hurt him to think that it was too late. That he could've loved her to the moon and back and yet, that wouldn't have been enough because the moment he slipped, she took off.

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