Later that evening in a penthouse apartment somewhere in Manhattan, Pops sat in his pajamas and slippers, chewing on a cigar and watching the evening news. Pops looked exactly like his son Rocco, just more aged and with a bigger paunch.
The newscaster said, "Okay, now it's time for our YouTube clip of the week. This one just happened a couple hours ago and already it has had over 50,000 hits. I have to tell you folks this one is so funny you'd think it was rehearsed. A family holidaying in Vegas had their camera out and caught the entire incident."
The clip played. It was Rocco and Tony staggering down the street. It showed Rocco banging into a black kid, striking Tony in the head and sending him head first into a garbage bin, which fell over, rolled down the sidewalk and into the bikes. Pops jumped out of his seat, grabbed the remote, and hit the rewind button. "Jimmy, Jimmy get in here."
"Yeah, what is it boss?" Jimmy ran in and scanned the room to see what agitated the old man so quick.
Pop's face had turned so red he looked like he would explode. "Take a look at this and tell me if you recognize anyone."
Jimmy burst out laughing when he saw Tony roll into the bikes. "That's Rocco andTony. What are they doing in Vegas, boss?"
"That's what I'd like to know."
"They were supposed to be on their way here. Get Rocco on the phone."
Jimmy stifled more laughter as he cleared his throat. "Ah, sure boss, right away," He pulled out his cell phone. "There's no answer."
"Keep trying."
At the end of the clip the news anchor went on to say, "One of the individuals in that video has been identified as Rocco Moretti of the New York Moretti crime family. Both men were arrested for public drunkenness. I guess the Moretti's aren't what they used to be."
"Christ! My son... Imbecile! He's still got the gift."
"What gift is that boss?"
It's called the Dunning-Kruger Effect. But I call it the Dunce and Clown Effect. It's a proven fact that when naturally stupid people like my son and his brainless cousin make decisions, their bottomless depth of incompetence denies them the mentalcapacity to appreciate their mistakes."
"Like the botched Jewelry heist?"
"Don't remind me."
"These mental midgets could fall into a barrel of tits and come out sucking their thumbs!" Pops screamed as he threw his fist in the direction of the TV screen. Pops grabbed at his thinning hair and looked towards heaven. "Jimmy, get that idiot son of mine on the phone!"
"Yeah, boss, I'm still trying, but if he's in the drunk tank, he probably doesn't have his phone."
"Aaaarghh!"
It had been quite some time since Jimmy had seen Pops this angry. Probably not since the botched Jewelry heist.
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