Forever And Always, You.

Chapter Two

'I need you every single day'

January 12 2012

Flashback
I quickly grabbed my school bag from the floor and rushed out the front door. Just in time before the beer bottle hit me, then I hear it crash against the door. I breath heavily and feel a bit lightheaded, So I grab my inhaler and swallow down the puff of air it offers me. I steady myself and walk. I start to walk down the pathway and I sigh when I hear him shout profanities at me.

His daughter.

I don't think I'll ever understand the healthy father daughter relationships I see with other families, when all my life I lived with a man who couldn't stand the sight of me.

Like it's just so unbelievable to me, when I walk down the hallway and I hear conversations like, " Yeah my dad took me out this weekend, we went to this super chill place..." And I just tune it off angrily.

Because no matter how sick or ridiculous this sounds, I always feel like their dads' are secretly abusing them but they put on this pretty good facade that everything is alright.

I probably sound so spiteful but it's the only way I've ever lived.  But I've grown to know that all dads are not the same. But that doesn't make me feel any better.

Instead it makes me more bitter that I have to be among the rotten eggs that have shitheads as dads. I guess that's why I have a best friend who's dad is dead. Makes it more bearable that she's not going to be blabbing in my ear about how cool her dad is or whatever.

I've dealt with that my whole life and I won't be keeping a friend with healthy daddy-daughter relationships.

Ugh. I sound so horrible, especially since Jamie sees her dead dad as some kind of perfect human which she has great memories with. I will force myself not to think that way again.

I take out my keys from my bag, pulling on the car door, that's when I see that one of my tires is getting flat and I need to get it changed. I groan and climb in and close the door immediately. I rub my hands together and blow warm air on them.

The cold is so unbearable today. I start the engine and the old car coughs before the engine revs and I reverse out of the driveway.

Fifteen minutes later I step into the school's hallway and I quickly rush into the girls bathroom and into one of the stalls and lock it. I open my bag and take out my trusty broken mirror and check my face for any bruises from this morning.

I sigh in relief, not much to clean up.

I carry my almost empty concealer stick to hide the rough red bruises on my neck. I smirk darkly, the non daddy issues girls, probably make out with boys and would call it hickeys, but here we are.

I hear the bell and hasten my cover up so I can leave for class. I get out a black sweatshirt from my bag and wear it over the top I wore. I pack all my stuff back into my bag, not before doing a double check of my face and my neck.

I grab a comb and quickly run it through my dark hair and rub a bit of chapstick on my lips. I stand up to leave.

The hallway is clearing up as some students have gone into classes, there are some that are still getting their stuff from the lockers, so I quickly get my Ap English book and stuff my bag into my locker. I walk into the class and take my seat by the window.