Proper Princess

Chapter Two

"Miss?" I asked, wiping away the last of my falling tears. I looked over to my governess, who was taking the kettle off the fire.

She finished pouring the water into the tea cups before glancing over to where I lay on the bed. "Yes, Amelia?"

I sat up as she handed me the cup, wincing and shifting slightly as I sat upon the horrid sting in my backside from where she had liberally applied the switch for being late for my bath. I was now at the age where each thrashing I got was assumed to be my last, but then I always did something else foolish soon after. "Do you think I am childish?"

Miss Lancing smiled, sitting in the chair beside my bed and placing her own cup and saucer on her lap. She took note of my squirming, raising her eyebrows as if that answered my question. "Well, you certainly are after a good lashing, but don't worry, my Darling- that can stay between us."

Using some real effort, I managed to be still, though I could not help but sit stiffly. Despite her sternness, Miss Lancing was one of the people I loved most in the world- while my parents were good people, they were also nobles. They had not been the ones to dress me, or teach me, or read to me. That had always been the role of my governess. Though I never could have admitted it aloud, I did truly think I may have cared for her more than anyone else in the world.

I found myself trying to hold back tears, though these ones were not as a result of my punishment. I missed the years of my childhood, when I had simply been able to be seated upon the lap of my governess after a whipping, or when I was hurt or anxious or...

Or frightened. Undeniably, I was terrified. Everything was changing, when so little had since the day I was adopted by the Baldwins. But no more could I simply hide in the arms of my governess. They could not protect me from the change that was coming.

Miss Lancing saw my tears, and placed her cup and saucer down on the bedtable. She reached to take my cup, as well, and I realized that it was shaking in my grip as my tears broke through. Once my cup was placed beside hers, Miss Lancing reached for my hands. "Now, what are these tears about, then?"

As my tears fell harder, my governess pulled me from my seat on the bed, and brought me to kneel between her legs as she embraced me. I hugged her around her waist, and found that even though I was now too big to sit on her lap, I still felt safe in her hold. I closed my eyes and allowed myself to believe, just for a moment, that she would be able to fix everything.

"They want me to be presented publicly," I mumbled after taking a moment to compose myself. I kept my face hidden as I spoke, and hoped that my voice was not muffled beyond comprehension. "First at the wedding, but then they want me to begin attending late-night balls as a debutante."

Miss Lancing was quiet for a moment, and I could almost picture the thoughtful frown upon her face. Finally, she spoke. "And that frightens you?"

I nodded shamefully, embarrassed by my weeping over something that every girl of my status had gone through. Elizabeth had transitioned into womanhood so easily, so gracefully.

But I was not my sister. Despite all of my efforts and education, I was hardly a real noble. Despite being adopted by nobles as a child, I had undeniably always been a bit of a black sheep, even if many of the white sheep around me had come to care for me as I was.

Miss Lancing put her hand under my chin, lifting my eyes to meet hers. "Amelia, you are a beautiful, sharp, compassionate young lady. You misstep from time to time, but your heart is good. That is what is most important in this world. That is how I know you will go on to thrive, even when I am gone."

There was a sinking feeling in my stomach. "When you are gone?"

My governess- the woman whom had nurtured me for a whole decade now- smiled down at me, though I thought I saw a bit of sadness in her face. "Amelia, Darling, once you are recognized as a debutante, you become a woman. Adults do not require governesses."