Robbers // H.S.

sixteen

Bloom Later - Jesse

August 16, 2021

To be honest, when I woke up on this fine Monday morning, I didn't think I'd be greeted the way I was.

Jesse's contact is still in my phone with two painting emojis next to it, so when I saw it pop up on my screen, I knew it was him instantly.

Jesse: Are you free?

Seeing him on Friday was such a shock that I didn't believe what had happened when I woke up the next day. Only when I clarified with Viv did I know for sure that an old friend was back.

Me: Let me check my calendar.

I sent it back. I twiddled my thumbs while I sat in my bed still in my pajamas as the clock struck 1 in the afternoon. I waited exactly 60 seconds before responding again. He doesn't need to know that I am in fact still groggy from only waking up twenty minutes ago, and that I, in fact, have more time on my hands than I know what to do with.

Me: I'm free after 2:30.

I give myself an hour and a half to fix whatever is going on with my hair. I pull it out of the rat's nest that has been sitting on top of my head for at least 36 hours. I roll out of bed, landing on my feet.

"Think Alice." I whisper to myself as I shuffle through my closet. "What will make me look good but not like I'm trying too hard?"

My bed becomes a mountain of clothes. It grows with each item thrown on top. I feel a growing headache, so I postpone the outfit search to go into the kitchen for some ibuprofen. Sitting on the counter was an orange pill bottle with a post-it note next.

"Don't forget your meds. - Viv"

The 'i' is dotted with a crescent moon, per usual. My eyes roll at the message, but I suffice the pit in my stomach that just wants to spite the note and take a daily dose of Zoloft along with the migraine pill.

I started my prescription after Kitty left. Thinking back, it will almost be four years. I end up skipping most days because the side effects aren't worth it. I lose myself when I take it. As if I am a shell of the Alice I truly am.

Back in my room, I ignore the mess and just choose a pair of low-rise jeans and a white tank top. Calling it a day. My mirror gets a front row seat to watch me check out every last angle of myself.

Everyday is a gamble when I wake up. I either think that I should be the highest paid model in the industry, even though I am merely 5'4", or I am the scum of the earth. No inbetween.

Today is one of the better days. I fluff out my hair and end up throwing all of the clothes sinking into my bed into the closet. Leaving that for future Alice to deal with.

Vivianne has been at work all day. I heard her moving around early in the morning, but I fell back asleep once the front door slammed. It gets pretty lonely during the day. Everyone is busy.

Everyone has their lives together.

But me.

While crossing my room, I step in something almost wet, maybe sticky? When I look down, I see my paint pallet on the ground from the night before. Red paint dyes the bottom of my foot, my throat growls.

As if timing couldn't be more perfect, a knock on the door happened to come into play.

"Hang on!" I yell down the hall while hopping on one foot around my room.