Saviour (bxb)

Chapter 5

(Kai's POV)

The principle dismissed us but I couldn't move my limbs. Everything was numb... why is he here?!

Warmth wrapped around my wrist, shifting my gravity and causing me to stumble towards the door. What the heck? I looked up, trying to find the source of the movement, to be met with Sora's golden eyes gazing at me with concern. Right... Sora is here as well...

I averted my gaze almost as quickly as I composed myself and followed him out of the office. I can't remember what the principle even had to say. I saw him standing there, hair the same mint colour and eyes which pierced my very soul and then I couldn't move. I probably would've stayed standing like a statue if Sora hadn't been there to pull me away. He probably deserved an explanation... but what am I supposed to tell him? I can't tell him the truth... at least not all of it.

I followed behind Sora until a cold breeze touched my face. We're outside? I stopped moving, grabbing onto Sora's arm. He met my eyes, confusion evident.
"I'm sorry... why are we outside? We have another class," I said quietly, Sora tensed slightly. My voice sounded strained and much weaker than I thought it would. I sound like a shell of myself... I'm really grateful that I'm with Sora and not Nate. Nate would know everything in my head the second those words escaped out of my mouth...

"We're outside because you look like someone just shot a puppy in front of you before pointing the gun in your direction, take some deep breaths of the fresh air, you look like you need it," Sora grumbled at me, rolling his eyes. I was grateful for the consideration but as I forced a large gush of air in, it was only comparable to acid in my lungs. The adrenaline seemed to be leaving my body and my legs started to shake. I need to sit down.

I stumbled towards the wall and slid down, allowing all of the tension to leave my muscles and my legs to give up on me. Please let me disappear... I don't want to be seen like this... I don't want to go back into the cycle of constant pain... I don't want everything to be ruined all over again... I don't want to be alone anymore...

"Do you want me to go and find your friend? Nate... I think his name was," Sora's voice asked, closer than I expected. I turned to see him hovering beside me... he looked worried and confused and lost, I was probably frightening him. What did he ask me? If I wanted Nate?

"No... I don't want-" I can't say I don't want him to see me like this.
"I don't want to be alone, I just need a minute," I amended. He seemed to be alright with that. Sora sat beside me and his warmth was easy to focus on while I got my breathing into a steady rhythm. "I'm sorry for worrying you, I'm alright now," I said when I knew my voice wouldn't shake. "I was a just bit startled... that boy used to go to school with me."

Sora didn't need all the details, that should be enough. He seemed to consider my words for a moment and nodded in acknowledgement. He smiled at me a little.
"As long as you're feeling better," he said softly.

"We are supposed to show him around tomorrow, but I can do that, you'll owe me for that though," He teased, breaking out into a huge grin. I was grateful for him moving away from the subject. "You have to come to hang out with me some time," He said with a smirk.

Oh. I didn't expect him to be so forward, he's usually shyer about these things. I do owe him for today though... couldn't be that bad to hang out.
"Alright," I sighed and smiled a little back at him. His face lit up in response and he nodded excitedly. He kind of reminds me of a puppy and I really wanna keep seeing his happiness and excitement like that. It makes everything else seem so small and far away. I could get lost in this feeling.

- Later that night -

(intrusive thoughts, self-harming thoughts and suicidal thoughts in this part, all of these thoughts are written in italics)